"Remember... Remember..." [V, https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0434409/?ref_=nv_sr_1?ref_=nv_sr_1]

AKA 'Bat_an Forever' [https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0112462/?ref_=nv_sr_1?ref_=nv_sr_1] A wiser older woman [AJ], once told me once that one way to really appreciate God's work in our lives is to keep a diary.  And while I do also have blogs that are also password protected, I think there was a little something also to the reasoning behind why one year in my Christian softball league, *3* teams exactly wanted to use this verse as their theme verse: Matthew 5:16  In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. Funny, I wonder if, perhaps with some strong influence of her parent(s), whether this number 3 is also indeed a favourite number of someone I know.  Other than that one entry, which I am kind of hoping not a lot of people found, I have tried my best using initials such as in the above to try to maintain 'anonymity' as much as possible.   I feel one of the biggest lies 'the enemy' wants us to believe is that we are 'small and insignificant', that what we do can't make a difference, kind of like that 'gloomy ending' I recently saw when I finally got a chance to watch The Lego Movie 2.  Another one might be as my TP, BC put it recently is that we are 'alone and isolated'.  Eventually, as anyone who follows or reads this blog will know, after a hiatus of not blogging for a few years, I decided to 'get back in the game' as I've realize that even though I no longer have people commenting on this blog, it does not mean that nobody is ever reading it anymore.  Also I shouldn't be offended that I still don't know who is/are the person or people who commented on my blog a few times starting way back in 2009, but the important thing I gathered from this whole blog experience is remaining anonymous still has its benefits.  Of course it does somewhat feel like I'm all alone in my 'blog universe' at times and nobody will get to know the real me.  I think it has become quite clear to my peers recently that I sometimes really do 'need to be heard', even if the cries sometimes come out in the few hours past midnight.   Today [01/09/2019], I also did something I haven't had a chance to do for a while, part of the reason was because last year I had a fair share of Sunday morning or early afternoon shifts at my HD position as well.  I felt spiritually, curiously, but 'not by sight', lead to visit another church again.  Another reason why I think I put a stop to such an activity is because as I mentioned in another entry on this blog, after the break down of 'the Hope Mobile', I was left with little alternatives but to take the bus for over an hour often in most cases each way to church.  In a way, I could have also tried for the alternative as to when a few times a biked to another nearby church a few of my closer friends also attend, but mom's always pretty paranoid around the idea of my bicycling and it just so happens 'the Hope Mobile' broke down right at the end of summer so it was just out of 'the bike riding season' at the time.  Perhaps I just have bike riding kind of "on the brain" [JH] because some friends of mine and I are planning on this activity tomorrow evening.  I would say that this time, the 'Leading' I got from God to attend this church was also more appropriate for the resulting Message I heard.  In the past, I just get an 'inking' or as 'gut feeling' to go attend a different church and I just go ahead and do it.  But it just so happened, this time around a bunch of events or circumstances the day prior lead me into the circumstance where I wasn't able to feel up for making it to my usual church that morning.  I would go so far to say the experience was 'so good' that on other weeks, due to the later service time of this church compared to my regular church, I have been sometimes late at my own church also do to issues with my bowel control which I have been tested for and thus far neither a cause nor a solution that would have a high chance of success has been put into place.    I continue this post a little later on in the month and since I am going back to the mentality that this blog can kind of be like a ministry, I think I need to 'take a hint' off something I heard recently about how another friend of mine wants to be more diligently and consistent on working on one of his other projects. In spite of potential lack of readership, for some years this blog had become one of the ways I had continually shared about my faith ongoing amidst my busy schedule. Kind of like the topic of sex that has come up in discussion in some of my assignments recently, I wonder exactly how much less “busy” people of the 1st century were and this whole struggle of ‘being too busy to talk about Jesus’ is unlikely to be a ‘new’ one. I thought I had some more thoughts typed up somewhere for this post.  But I can't seem to locate them easily.  When I look at some of the more recent posts of mine, I would say the one thing I may have done which relates to what one Pastoral Counsellor has mentioned right was trying to expand on the possibilities for opportunities that God may give you.  While there are also certain things I don't believe God is going to provide opportunity for and this can go beyond the context of my entries, employment, having children, etc... "I only provide for Mine" [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H7h5BHax06c].  So the way I see it, the only reason why people either remain single or get married is when both parties are submitting to God's plan for their lives.   Similar to the analogy from employment search or 'job hunting' that MB likes to use, I wonder this is a good analogy to my endeavors in that area.  In my society and our ever changing job market, it is not uncommon for people to now use the perspective that a few years at a particular job is considered "a long time".  I wonder if this has an impact on the way people view faith and religion as well. I have been a Christian for around two decades now, perhaps one of the reasons why God chose me is relevant to what I have learned in my cultural society about a lot of younger people nowadays don’t really care much about Christianity anymore. When I reflected about this in a recent assignment, I realized there is some truth to this, at most of the churches I’ve attended recently, the majority of the congregation would not be people my age or younger. Yet you may not get the same demographic walking through a mega mall at a larger city for example. So at the date I post this entry, it would not be unusual to take any two random people off the street under the age of 30 and the likelihood that at least 1 of every 3 people, if not 2, in that demographic, do not attend church on a regular basis. “Church” is quickly becoming the “new marriage”, in the sense that people don’t really want to make time for church amidst the other things they could be doing with their life. Recently, one of my textbooks also talks about the fidelity of marriage in the future if we extend the average life span to 150, but again with a view back on ‘Biblical times’, being married to the same person, even if the sexual fidelity was not there as was in the case of Abraham and Sarah’s and Jacob and Rachel, didn’t seem to be too much of an issue for them, even if the “certificate of divorce” was already present in the first century [Matthew 5:31]. [POST IN PROGRESS] Recently, I’ve noticed I’m using the above ‘tag’ a lot in a number of my recent entries. I had assumed with the majority of my employment opportunities being put on hold in light of the pandemic would give me ample opportunity to catch up on many things. But I realized also there have been many other things I’ve queued up and put on hold that have been piling up. I have also been largely distracted by keeping up with various news regarding the pandemic. Perhaps like that advice or website article I’ve read regarding writing sermons as I need to do for one of my classes suggests, I need to block off certain days beginning tomorrow with a clear focus on what I am planning to accomplish for each of those days. Of course having some flu like symptoms the last two weeks wasn’t at all helpful either I bet.

"He killed all the women man..." [IL]

I remember in one of my 'transitional churches' before my current one, we were sitting down talking about 'something' before.  I wasn't really sure if there were any side topics leading up to this one, but eventually, I think we were talking about the subject of 'dating/courting'.

Funny how also we had mentioned the topic of Urbana that night at the ‘BBTea&restaurant’ and a few Urbanas and another Christian history course later we are kind of ‘back to the same old story’.  Recently, in the last two years I’ve also been receiving some relationship coaching as a ‘side project’ from professional therapists.  I realize that although it isn’t entirely myself who is deciding not to ‘date’, I might finally be understanding what IL meant in his ‘parody of K Arthur’.

I believe I did write another blog entry previously closer to the date of this actual event but may not have gone into a lot of details, so let’s go back and first revisit some of the dialogue/theology discussed that night.  I feel an overall sense that what my friends were trying to point out to me that night was an important lesson I didn’t then realize would be very applicable and ‘prophetic’ [Acts 2] is overall that I 'shouldn't get too hung up on any one girl'.  So let's quickly recap some of the quotes from that night:

"You've been to one Urbana, BUT IT'S NOT THE ONLY Urbana..." [AW]

"I think it's cool though... if it doesn't work out with one girl, he moves on to the next... YOU KNOW, like MOVING ON..." [JY]

"Recently, I've been reading this author, K Arthur... total Male Chauvinist... Serve God, Serve God.  We don't need women..." [IL]

"He killed all the women man..." [IL]

"Remember K____, Josh Harris was a complementarian as well.." [IL]

'You might find the world outside of LB__ a much more savage place than you remembered...' [K____]

When I couldn't go back to sleep earlier, God revealed to me that I had been procrastinating this entry.  I was also reminded that I mostly forgot all of the conversations that night except for the 'take away' at the very last 4 direct quotes and was reminded of my own 'prophecy' in that last one that is a slight paraphrase.  I remember once how IL had commented that 'a lot of my blogs don't seem to make any sense'.  I think it can be the style I write my blog that only people who actually know me more personally, including myself can usually be clued into the full context of the situation(s) I'm writing on.  In interest of understanding the 'context' of this particular post though, I will point out that we were just sitting around and hanging out and I believe just like in the past how I used to relate myself sometimes to the Biblical King David, that my friends here were likely trying to do a '1 Samuel 12 thing' here in being nonchalant and quite indirect in what they were trying to communicate to me with kind of 'reversed results'.

I didn't end up being in much regular contact with this group of people for some years after this event and it wasn't necessarily anything personal against the thing(s) they said or did, some other stuff happened that ended up separating our relationships, including the fact that I eventually got called and migrated to a different church altogether.  This is part of the 'go west' calling I maybe mentioned to some of my friends.  But aside from eventually losing connection with that group and other groups I have known in the past, I have learned another important lesson that it is also important not to 'get too hung up over human relationships' in general as ultimately we live for God, not others.  This was and still is an important lesson and life principle to keep in mind.  As although I didn't pursue every female I thought it might have been nice to be married to, most of them are now already married to other people.  So I feel kind of like KK feels like in the text shown in the picture below:

I may not have had a conversation of that nature with some of those females.  However, if you believe marriage is completely a free choice, it makes for 'a bad theological combination' because the only logical conclusion as to why a person didn't get married to a person he or she wanted to get married to is because the other person chose not to marry you.  I try to live my life the way KB pointed out in one of her sermons regarding ‘inheritance’ that in the end “none of that mattered” [KB] and whether I’m married or not doesn’t necessarily affect or is factored in the evaluation of the other aspects of how I lived life [1 Corinthians 7:17-31, 1 Peter 3:15-17].

The interesting thing is I am adding everything following this sentence as a revision to 'fix' this entry a bit kind of like how last night for whatever reason the link to the first picture from Kellers' book was 'broken' when I was trying to view it last night but it is now 'fix'ed.  "Speaking of Broken...":

As inspired by BC recently, I will "return to the Genesis Narrative"...

The Lord Said:

"This is a broken bone like my bones [https://life-of-agent-k.blogspot.com/search?q=swan+neck+deformity]
and the flesh of my Flesh;
he shall be called 'K___,'
 for he was rebirthed through the Son of Man." :)

[modified Genesis 2:23]

I just realized how repetitive I was in some of my messages to one of my female friends last night, I guess it really is true, as PW/BO or BLL would put it:

"He's Old Testament..." [https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1596343/characters/nm0908094?ref_=tt_cl_t2]