i-DAWN: (8) I'm sorry you can't have PERFECT... (8)

*G*: Princess or no Princess does not change your Prince Kaspian mission...

"You still have to fulfill your duties..."

(8) I've tried to resist, try to run from His kiss... but I know I know... (8)

As much as I want to, I can't fight the DAWN of God's reality and as much as I had planned to sleep earlier, He showed me tonight the confirmation of the decision I had to make soon by tomorrow morning.

Instead of TYPING that other entry I thought God wanted me to finish, I found myself READING tonight instead...

Last line of * RH... CCC The pact-convenant.txt * completes the confirmation as tough of a decision it is to make, it is the one I ought to make.

Just because _ _ _ and I have issues doesn't mean I've LOST who I am... after all, I cannot lose something which is secured in Jesus Christ. [Luke 15]

*G*: "If you find a perfect church, don't join it, because if you join it, you will make it imperfect..."

i-Class: In Hebrew repetition is used for emphasis... ("oh BURN..." Oh NO you can't ...you have to ACCEPT REALITY)

God has very firmly answered my question tonight as to (8) Should I stay or should I go... (8) STAY!

K's Shadow: You know that other church is pretty good too... (let me get one thing straight, there's NOTHING WRONG with going to THAT church, it's just that it may not be God's church for me....)

You made a PACT Prince Kaspian... Even if it means God is using His OWN Prophecy against you... But the one written with your "own hand" Mr. 1 Corinthians 7... The one that withstood the "Spiritual Revision" you mentioned.

(8) Now I can tell you why... (8) [the same friend also text messaged me a one word message: "Why?"]

For Jesus is why you must die... not a physical death to yourself... not an obligation death to a church... but a death of giving up your own life, so you find that you...

(8) ...might truly live... (8) [see verses pasted below]

"These things don't just happen you know..." [Sweet Home Mississauga]

Matthew 10:39
Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.

Matthew 16:25
For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it.

Luke 9:24
For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it.

Luke 17:33
Whoever tries to keep his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life will preserve it.

It is of benefit for most to read the whole chapters where these verses are found, but I did it as the above to show the Hebraic repetition aforementioned. Being called by God to experience another church for the last feel weeks, the Lord truly shed the light on my underlying issue, especially during that last sermon in the series at that church about church leaders mentioned in my last entry. While I was there, I noticed, hey I like these sermons, I like the setup, I like the people there too, it was like heaven on earth, the "PERFECT CHURCH" if you will.

However, "It's not about you" like my Christian friend text messaged to me the very same morning. I was like WHOA... does he know that I am awake 6AM this morning listening to the sermon with that screen shot? Perhaps not, but GOD knows. From the recollection of Urbana 2006 and Rick Warren's presence there and book, to the very spiritually profound experience I had at the MCBCSL Praise Night on May 1st, 2009 with the theme "It's not about me" and now these visits to Meeting House, I realized, HEY... God you're trying to tell me something here! "Stop looking at how *I AM* can help you with YOUR needs... look at how you can help Me with Mine..."

7Jesus replied, "You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand."

8"No," said Peter, "you shall never wash my feet."
Jesus answered, "Unless I wash you, you have no part with me."

9"Then, Lord," Simon Peter replied, "not just my feet but my hands and my head as well!"

10Jesus answered, "A person who has had a bath needs only to wash his feet; his whole body is clean. And you are clean, though not every one of you." 11For he knew who was going to betray him, and that was why he said not every one was clean.

12When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place. "Do you understand what I have done for you?" he asked them. 13"You call me 'Teacher' and 'Lord,' and rightly so, for that is what I am. 14Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another's feet. 15I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. 16I tell you the truth, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. 17Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them. [John 13:7-16]

While to me, Meeting House may seem like the PERFECT church, RHCBC remains a "perfectly good one". The way the congregants at Meeting House conduct themselves truly reminds me of one thing, while we are gathered as one body [1 Corinthians 12], we don't need to be in any particular "role" to help others. Just by being honest and transparent, they have already helped me so much in the same attitude of John 13 above.

Allow me to set the context a bit more for those who may not have thought so much about the (seemingly minor) details of this event. Back in those days, the majority of people wore sandals and also relied on walking as a primary form of transportation. Furthermore, the environment they walked was very unlike our modern sidewalks and pavement and they often walked on dirt roads and I guess for those of you who are around in the GTA... imagine trying to walk around "Chinatown" in your bare feet. Ya... Not pleasant. So since people had dusty, dirty feet the majority of the time, it was customary for people to just leave their feet dirty and not bother washing them. A present day equivalent is like when a friend would tell you not to bother washing the car if it was going to rain the next day and he knows you'll be out driving anyhow. This could explain why in other passages, Jesus tells us disciples to "shake the dust off your feet" (Matthew 10:14, Mark 6:11, Luke 9:5) as a gesture of being spiteful towards those who don't welcome the disciples on their ambassadorship.

There are instances though in Judaism religious custom though where feet washing is also done before receiving priestly blessing [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ritual_washing_in_Judaism], and this might be something Jesus was trying to hint at before communion to show that it was a form of blessing He was about to bestow upon them. But I think even in these cases it was done by the individual and not the priest, someone correct me if I am wrong. He seems to hint at this in John 13:7 "You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand."

My point of all this, is Jesus' act of washing his disciples' feet is very much like if you were to step into someone's house and the host would come up to you and say: "Oh... let me take off your shoes for you..." There are some exceptions were elderly have trouble bending down to get them on/off, but the majority of us would naturally think and/or say: "Oh... you don't have to do that..." The whole point of all this is that no act is nor should be considered "too small". Even something like saying "hi" to somebody at church could go a long way for someone who really needed that greeting. No act is too small, nor any act will go unrewarded or if necessary punished. (Ezekiel 24:14; 36:19, Matthew 6:4; 6:6; 6:18; 1 Corinthians 4:5, Revelation 20:12-13) So before I change to a more Christmas theme, I'm gonna first quote the original version of Prince Caspian's identity discovery:

Caspian: Then I have failed you.
Doctor Cornelius: Everything I told you, everything I didn‟t… It was only because I believe in you. You have a chance to become the most noble contradiction in history: The Telmarine who saved Narnia.

“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”- Isaiah 9:6

Last year I also wrote 3 entries in December and mentioned about the Christmas I had that year. Particularly, the last entry I wrote that year focused around Christmas. The Christmas celebrations are over and done with and this will be the last entry for this year also as I am heading up to Urbana 2009 tomorrow. It's so unbelievable that 3 years have gone by already since I also mentioned Urbana 2006 in that entry [http://life-of-agent-k.blogspot.com/2008/12/yes-lord-yes-lord-yes-yes-lord.html].

http://life-of-agent-k.blogspot.com/2008/12/yes-lord-yes-lord-yes-yes-lord.html

"We all have to do our parts..." [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0178145/]

--------------

H: "Are you in the middle of exams right now?"

Made it all the more harder to stop the revelations in the middle of my History II exam man!!!
[Wouldn't you like to know :P]
...

Including The Call:

“You may find RH*C*BC a MUCH MORE SALVAGE PLACE THAN YOU REMEMBERED... I spelled it GO-zalez?!?!... ARGH... no wonder I need an editor and make too many grammer mistakes...”

--------------

???: You have the opportunity to become the greatest contradiction in history... the fatherless boy from the Mississauga neighbourHOOD who goes UPTOWN to bring about the reformation of their spirituality...

PF: "Our English congregation can be so much more..."

PK: "Amen to that..."

God you made it clear, I am here to stay even if you (8) break my heart for what breaks yours... (8)...

Only Christ can SETME3...

AMEN!

*G*: "DO let circumstances dictate what I am leading you to, BUT only IF you see Me THROUGHOUT your circumstances..."

PFT: "Some people look at their circumstances and they fail to see God, instead we ought to watch God work through our circumstances..."

OH... I get it Lord, why you wanted me to type it like THAT... not only was it my previous license plate before mom insisted on changing it, it is also the filename...

I noticed God may be intentional about only providing 3 points of introspection, so going with the pattern; here is the poetry God inspired me to some months/weeks ago:

1)
I wondered if I ever would (would rhymes with "should" but I just corrected it now from "world"... seems an unlike typo...)
Or if God thinks I should
Ever bring more than me
To be one's _ _ _ _ _ to be

2)
I was born to be free
And I always will be
Jesus is the One for me...
You too I always will see...

3)
I ask now thee to help me light
Two sinners who try to make right
Once was lost but now am found
The love of God knows no bound

*G*: PATIENCE YOUNG PADIWAN...

FRUSTRATION stems from LACK OF TRUST... Even amidst your circumstances... Something I should be already very familiar with, but I guess Jesus had to give me an EEF... Evangelism Explosion Formation? No... EXTREMELY EPIC FAIL.... Not going to mention the details here...

I was reminded of a very COMPREHENSIVE REALITY lately by the grace of seeking Spiritual Direction, God's plan is subject to what humans or even God Himself may temporarily interpret as failure. For those interested in the sermon God gave me when he caused BOTH of my computers to "FAIL" on me (temporarily) so that I would "listen to an older Podcast"... it is Joshua Harris' Courage and Compassion sermon 02/10/2009 through the Covenant Life Church Podcast in the i-Tunes store.

*G*: "You can be at the very centre of God's will and still face OPPOSITION and SUFFERING..."

Most Christians may incorrectly presume that God's plan MUST BE perfect, what are you talking about here K? It CANNOT fail... Hello? What bible are you reading? To use Numbers 14 as just one example. Wait... opps... flip back to Genesis 3... what do you see? FAIL...

Just like one of my other blog entries that mysterious disappeared during the spiritual revision. I have decided to end this entry with a challenge to the reader(s) on how God can help them more than how God has already helped me. Just like the repeated message lately which would have been RE-INGRAINED not at 6AM this morning, but rather last week had I LISTENED to God and just went to Meeting House as the Lord asked:



For those of you who aren't going to watch the sermon, it was as if even when I was extremely busy finishing my big term assignment, God kept pushing me to go experience this sermon. "It's not about yours truly..." The sermon was directed to the "me" attitude of church leaders, WOW God...Just like another point from that sermon pointed out, it's about the COMMUNITY as well. So what happens? God wakes me up at 6AM this morning to watch it online instead before the follow up sermon. I realized I "GOT TOLD" by God through the entire series of sermons and the conclusion I've been "wrestling" with will be explained in my next entry.

Today I was uniquely recommended by YouTube twice to watch Taylor Swift's "You Belong With Me" music video. I had already seen this before, but I felt this time, God wanted me to observe something more carefully from it. I thought to myself as I observed carefully why God would choose to do so and I noticed it's all in the glasses or possibly fake corrective lenses she is wearing. It was not until I had to undergo my contact vision therapy and learned the details of how it works that I realized just how "blind" people who need to rely on correct lenses actually see. And more importantly, the concept of how we believe we can see, when we really don't... vis-a-vie even myself who while optically can see better than 20/20 at times, can still be "blind" to certain things only God can see better than I see myself.

I feel the corrective lenses she wears in that video is a metaphor for her change in perspective. She is without glasses at the very end I believe not only because she wanted to "look pretty" but it's also to indicate that she is finally seeing things clearly. I believe as Christians and non-Christians we can all relate to this experience of being blind to something which has been true all along. Or perhaps in other cases, we believe something is true, but it's not.

Sometimes I truly know in my heart, to really *G*:"LET GOD BE GOD" and have this Godcast be assisted with Divine authorship. Now you might ask, why doesn't God just write it Himself instead of enlisting my help? If so, you are asking the WRONG question! Think about the context I was setting up with that scene from i-Robot before the spiritual revision. It turns out also, that based on the overarching theme of the sermon at Meeting House today. It is so ironic that my car even ended up breaking down as a means for God to prevent me from not obeying the spirit's calling to be at Meeting House at 10AM. With the context of the line from Shakespeare's' Hamlet when someone noticed "There is method to his madness" about Hamlet's alleged fraudulent insanity. I realized from this same "Meeting House 10AM" sermon and after completing this blog entry that I have quoted non-supernatural sources of God's speaking to me that punch line from the sermon "God can speak through ordinary circumstances" as well is truly "method to His Holiness".

I AM sorry I was wrong Lord...

First and foremost Jesus... once somebody dedicates something as a God cast... he would be very selfish to close it unless God wants him to keep it that way. Afterall, it isn't his to close... He would be commiting humanity's core sin again, selfishness...

Ask, Seek, Knock
7"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.
9"Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! 12So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.

[Matthew 7:7-10]

Approxiametly nine months ago, that same idiot wrote an entry that implied something like there are no basic principles to God, not exactly with that title. Let me put it this way, it has something to do with the FIRST meaning of the initials p.J. ;)...

But it was revealed by the ALL KNOWING God to him this fine day that he was so very wrong... That a root can be found to almost everything. Including "God". Allow me to throw some out the "basic principles":

1) Ask -> Listen
2) Seek -> Learn
3) Knock -> Love/Live

In essence, or as a starting point:

When we ASK anything, including trying to find out what God will DO in the matter, we need to LISTEN.

Why do we SEEK after something if not to LEARN about and more importantly FROM it....

God is always KNOCKing... we KNOW and LIVE this in God's version of LOVE, in the only pure form.

K _ _ _ _:

God, grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
The courage to change the things that I can;
And the wisdom to know the difference.

[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serenity_Prayer]

That person, is yours truly...

"The Problem IS Choice..." -WW Sunday School clip from Matrix RELOADED

A prophecy concerning Dumah :
Someone calls to me from Seir,
"Watchman, what is left of the night?
Watchman, what is left of the night?"

[Isaiah 21:11]

...

Music starts playin like the end of a sad movie,
It's the kinda ending you don't really wanna see.
Cause its tragedy and it'll only bring you down,
Now I don't know what to be without you around.

And we know its never simple,
Never easy.
Never a clean break, no one here to save me.
You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand,
And I cant,
Breathe,
Without you,
But I have to,
Breathe,
Without you,
But I have to.

Never wanted this, never wanna see you hurt.
Every little bump in the road I tried to swerve.
But people are people,
And sometimes it doesn't work out,
Nothing we say is gonna save us from the fall out.

And we know its never simple,
Never easy.
Never a clean break, no one here to save me.
You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand,
And I cant,
Breathe,
Without you,
But I have to,
Breathe,
Without you,
But I have to.

Its two a.m.
Feelin' like I just lost A Friend.
Hope you know its not easy,
Easy for me.
Its two a.m.
Feelin' like I just lost A Friend.
Hope you know this ain't easy,
Easy for me.

...

[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4a9O_jm8YA4]

*1*
---
May 9th...http://life-of-agent-k.blogspot.com/2009/05/conincidencecn-same-thing-who-says-its.html

May 10th...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6BTnuPOluwM&NR=1

May 11th...http://life-of-agent-k.blogspot.com/2009/05/ill-choose-truth-he-jesus-likes.html

*2*
---
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rncIFbEhkEU

So then we are left to ask ourselves... just which one is DWONG (the wrong) answer???