"My back... my back..."

That wasn't the original link I wanted to use to help facilitate the meaning behind this post, but as the Archie comic once (kinda put it about a different desire)... "Can't give link you want... WANT link you have..." In the start of the evening, all of a sudden my back started to hurt and I thought to myself, my younger biological brother barely touched me and then it stopped and I realized that's not the reason why I can't sleep... "I can't take it..." Reminds me of that time of my once of a lifetime experience of Easter service, when people were "listening to Podcast"... someone told me "I dunno, I see a red line..." and a good buddy of mine who has the spare keys to my "faith-mobile" all of a sudden had back pains... LOL "congratulations"? Buddy, you are the one who just got married to Jesus that Sunday and before that Easter too, I should be CONGRATULATING YOU! :)

The post date was supposed to be Monday, but I was busy with school work. Besides, I'm likely gonna to just joint down the details of the event so I don't forget it and finish this entry at a later date anyhow. Anyhow, interestingly enough... I experienced a "follow-up" or as some might wanna call "balance" instead to one of my previous blog entries. At first (to my shame), I was afraid to admit that when I heard the "audible voice of God" it sounded like a female because LOL we "all know"... God's NOT female right? ROFL... that's another "can of (Lutheran) Worms" I rather not open at the moment. But the point is, it makes sense in light of what happened today.

Today I got a little lost trying to make my way to my friends' office to carpool with him to class, so I ended up doing what one might call a "detour traffic and construction FAIL"... I never thought I could get lost in my home town, but I guess most of my driving and riding nowadays has been relocated and so are my navigation skills? But what about my GIFT of long term memory? Well I did know the route, but for some reason I just ended up lost anyhow... so lo and behold when I finally got there, my other friend was also there waiting so I had the opportunity to chat with her a little bit. Then later decided I should "get reading" as I got a lot of work to catch up on ever since recovery from my illness. So AS SOON AS I STARTED reading... WHOA... they were playing that Taylor Swift song... YES... THAT ONE... O M _ right...I mean... this is a doctor's office waiting room here... kinda out of place too LOL, albeit it's a "chinese" office so they are probably just using a radio and not a CD player maybe, but still why do this to me Lord?!?! WAIT it gets even more 2 Corinthians 5:13... cause like not too long after, I all of a sudden heard my name called repeatedly this time... LOL I guess you could say that saying "speak Lord, your servant is listening" did not quite put a stop and more direct response to it this time, but required more interpretation and for me to recall also the first time this sequence of events happened. Apparently it's someone named "__l___" apparently this time, wasn't 100% sure, the "secretary" or "receptionist" might have just been saying my name first and then the other one because nobody responded. It was strange the name was repeated so many times though... didn't count how many. Yes, you got it, this time it makes more sense that the "receptionist" WAS FEMALE as most typically are... I've even heard (again "for shame") that they hardly hire males for these roles. So you could say the sequence of events made a near perfect match, except this time I was in a WAITING room instead of a BANQUET and there was less DISTORTION... didn't hear the lyric as "TEAM CAPTAIN" this time, just the song was going on and I wasn't really try to pay attention to any of the noises there anyhow... Come to think of it, since the office was closing soon, I don't recall hearing any more songs that day, maybe also cause the desk thought the person they were calling couldn't hear over the music too perhaps, who knows...

1 Corinthians 15:18 (New International Version)

Then those also who have fallen asleep in Christ are lost.

:P..... :P!!!

I looked up the song on Youtube and this time, I noticed something I had not noticed before, the name of the album it's on... "I'm just as scared as you _ _ _ _ _"... I thought to myself, perhaps these pauses in the lagtube are part of giving me the opportunity to have breaks to finish this entry perhaps. No more holds bars anymore when I can't sleep... all K breaKs loose... I refuse to give in... I know Satan's voice is out there telling me to give up, it's never gonna to work... but on the other hand I know my "saviour lives" and I refuse to live and sleep a sinner! Satan tells me "it's already been brought" but I say "I've already been brought!" (1 Corinthians 6:20)

At first I was debating whether I should put my own interpretation down in words... "like you know..." "" And I'm not here to try to make you "worry"... I guess it's like I have been thinking all week, regardless of what happens and how much you might hate me, Jesus needs you to know, that until He changes His mind... "So here I AM, standing in your doorway... I've always been standing on your doorway..."

I haven't posted my STARDATE entry yet, because I believe that story hasn't come to an end yet... "I know you think we can't be together. But can't you respect me enough to let me make my own decision? I know there'll be _ _ _ _ _. But I want to face them with you. It's wrong that we should only be half-alive... ...half of ourselves." All I knows is, and I don't care if She never feels the same way... All I knows is, to give up on A G A P E... all I end up doing is going back to the man I was... yes that's right folks... it's not "pretty" as they say... As those who've watched the *3*rd installment of the Spiderman series know... The couple-phobic insomniac (that kinda is already happening)... Mr. "world does not revolve around you" when people don't understand why it is I can't stand couples if you recall some of my older entries... Yes, that's right, AnaSIN SkystalKer... you know "the dark side"... it's ironic to think that yes it's true, the same man who people are very happy to be their softball captain once had a "darker" past and was REJECTED from even captaining in the first place. I don't want to go back there so if the saying is true. "Damned if I do... Damned if I don't..." then I choose to "don't" sin... Esther 4:16

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0281358/quotes

(8)... Did the CAPTAIN of the Titanic cry...? (8)

As another Mr. Lau (hint, he's famous :P) once put it "_ _ _ _ _ isn't finding someone
you can live with... it's finding that person you can't live without..." Sometimes I wonder if maybe when I can't sleep should I try to take in large amounts of food to try to make me get a "food coma" haha, is this what they call "A G A P E on a diet"? "Like you know... MOVING ON"? :/

If I really can't sleep, I'm just going to try to get an early start, perhaps even finish to my assignment LOL... boy is that why I can't sleep? Then Luke 5:8, He is our father! :)

STARDATE *ALL THOSE GOOD TIMES MY CCF brethren and I have/had singing BSB Songs...*

Hehe, YES these singers ARE Christian :)

[Spoken]
Baby I know your hurting
Right now you feel like you could never love again
Now all I ask is for a chance
To prove that I love you
From the first day
That I saw your smiling face
_ _ _ _ _, I knew that we would be together forever
Ooh when I asked you out
You said no but He'd found out
Darling that you'd been hurt
You felt that you'd never love again
I deserve a try _ _ _ _ _ just once
Give me a chance and I'll prove this all wrong
You walked in you were so quick to judge
But _ _ _ _ _ he's nothing like me
Chorus
I'll never break your heart
I'll never make you cry
I'd rather die than live without you
I'll give you all of me
_ _ _ _ _ that's no lie (2x)
As time goes by you
Will get to know me
A little more better
Girl that's the way love goes
And I know you're afraid
To let you're feelings show
And I understand
But girl it's time to let go
I deserve a try _ _ _ _ _
Just once
Give me a chance and I'll prove this all wrong
You walked in you were so quick to judge
But _ _ _ _ _ he's nothing like me
Darling why can't you see
Chorus (2x)
Bridge
No way, no how
I'll make you cry (2x)
Chorus

[http://www.lyrics007.com/Backstreet%20Boys%20Lyrics/I%27ll%20Never%20Break%20Your%20Heart%20Lyrics.html]

Maybe when "hell freezes over" would I leave the term Girl-A-NOT-*A*-GOOD Girl for you's pet name for her husband in there...

Seems only right to end it with a song that probably was written around the same time I've been "praying for a wife...and..." *cough cough* "sit on your (my) ass..."