I have been having trouble sleeping these last few nights... the pain from my recovering finger kept me up almost till 6AM Sunday morning and the painkillers didn't seem to do much... I was speculating maybe they backfired and maybe caused me pain instead, so I didn't even take them tonight at first, but yet the finger still hurts...
To be honest, I had to rewrite most of this blog entry, because the auto-save wasn't working, so "oh me of little faith" I tried to copy and paste the whole thing into a text file "just in case" and guess what, I hit "paste" instead of "copy" and nuked pretty much the whole thing. *sigh*... well in the words of William Forester (as per the HW production): "... the second draft is written with your mind..." but this 2nd version is going to make me seem holier than I really was if I cut out the "faith struggle part"...
Anyhow to cut to the chase, God told me "I have something to say to you... listen to 99.5 FM..." so I go onto the web cast and here are the first 3 songs...
1) Brandon Heath - Give Me Your Eyes Lyrics
2) (the vocals on this female singer were kind of hard to make out, the parts I did get were too generic so google as I might, I could not identify this song)
3) Draw me close to You
Anyhow the stream was already in the middle of song #1 when I tuned it out ("His frequency" as something PF explained to me recently the last time I talked to him):
Too ashamed to tell his wife
He's out of work
He's buying time
All those people going somewhere
Why have I never cared?
*Chorus
Me: Say... what?
Full Lyrics @http://www.kovideo.net/lyrics/b/Brandon-Heath/Give-Me-Your-Eyes.html
Now song 3... oh boy... I remember this one time about 3 months ago, God was telling me "go to service again Sunday and you will have all the answers you seek..." and so I did 02/22/2009... I wasn't really sure what God was trying to tell me exactly, but I do remember the irony that a lot of the songs that morning were kinda err... "intimate"... especially "Draw me close to You"... and this was the song I was thinking about in particular when I was sharing with UT and explaining "We don't need to sing these particular type of songs to understand our love for God..." and he just kinda giggled (understandingly I assume?)...
So what are You saying? That She still loves me? But I think EVEN MORE IMPORTANTLY... God still loves me... this I know... Whoa... when I type this sentence I still have the stream on and this song just came on:
VERSE:
Who am I that you are mindful of me
That you hear me, when I call
Is it true that you are thinking of me
How you love me, it's amazing (Who am I Lord)
CHORUS:
I am a friend of God
I am a friend of God
I am a friend of God
He calls me friend
Verse
BRIDGE:
God Almighty
Lord of Glory
You have called me friend
Chorus
Anyhow, guess what, the night before I was thinking of this quote from the same show I got the "...that's why there's us, Champions, to live as if the world is as it ought to be, to show it what it can be etc..."
"_ _ _ doesn't want you, but I still do..."
Ok, to end your cliff-hanging, "God doesn't want you, but I still do..." and it was spoken by the umm... well one of the "lovers", of the character who says the first quote... but the same night I was just typing an e-mail to my friend to tell her that I've been getting things all backwards, I need to put God first not my marriage concerns... Well guess what, God's talking back... I see He does "have something to tell you (K)..." afterall :)
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...the next generation
Not sure who invented it, but presently, it has been a number of years ago now that I have heard someone express that "a generation is ...
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"I WAS now more distressed that ever; for I saw more and more my danger, and the necessity of an Almighty Friend to stand by me for time and eternity. I spent not only almost all that night, but also the next day and many days and nights, being bowed down and guilt and darkness, crying for mercy. O mercy, mercy for my precious and immortal soul."
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