The Mr. of a great Mr....

I remember reading this book from the Chicken Soup series and I think it was "Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soup". I do hope to read "Chicken Soup for the Christian Soul" someday ;) Anyhow the story was called "The Miss of a great Miss" and it was a story about how this guy wanted this girl so badly, but he always thought there was no way he was good enough for a girl like her. So he never asked her out, later on her friend tells him "She got over you..." and how he was always leading her on, but it never happened. So he regrets cause something could have happened.

Last night we had a farewell Karaoke party for my good friend "JChao" as we like to call him. A.K.A. Yao Ming LOL... but we also had a time of sharing about our times and memories of Jason, even his parents shared. I never really did get up and share about him, but "daughter" did do a good sharing. He really is full of love and might I add joy too I believe. I remember my best times with J is when we're joking around and having so much fun. We've also had some very good Spiritual discussions together. J, you will definetly be missed, especially since you are on my mailing list and everything! Edmonton seems so far away... I wonder if the Accord can even handle such a distance... But as a fellowship, we may decide to rent a bus to go there :P

Here is a song a guy sang during the sharing time:

Bill Withers - Lean on Me
----------------------------

Sometimes in our lives we all have pain
We all have sorrow
But if we are wise
We know that there's always tomorrow

Lean on me, when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Til I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on

Please swallow your pride
If I have things you need to borrow
For no one can fill those of your needs
That you don't let show

Lean on me, when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Til I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on

If there is a load you have to bear
That you can't carry
I'm right up the road
I'll share your load
If you just call me

So just call on me brother, when you need a hand
We all need somebody to lean on
I just might have a problem that you'd understand
We all need somebody to lean on

Lean on me when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
Till I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on

Lean on me...

This was the song I dedicated and sang to J:

Artist: Bette Midler Lyrics
Song: Wind Beneath My Wings Lyrics

Oh, oh, oh, oh -
It must have been cold there in my shadow,
to never have sunlight on your face.
You were content to let me shine, that's your way.
You always walked a step behind.

So I was the one with all the glory,
while you were the one with all the strain.
A beautiful face without a name for so long.
A beautiful smile to hide the pain.

Did you ever know that you're my hero,
and everything I would like to be?
I can fly higher than an eagle,
for you are the wind beneath my wings.

It might have appeared to go unnoticed,
but I've got it all here in my heart.
I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it.
I would be nothing without you.

Did you ever know that you're my hero?
You're everything I wish I could be.
I could fly higher than an eagle,
for you are the wind beneath my wings.

Did I ever tell you you're my hero?
You're everything, everything I wish I could be.
Oh, and I, I could fly higher than an eagle,
for you are the wind beneath my wings,
'cause you are the wind beneath my wings.

Oh, the wind beneath my wings.
You, you, you, you are the wind beneath my wings.
Fly, fly, fly away. You let me fly so high.
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings.
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings.

Fly, fly, fly high against the sky,
so high I almost touch the sky.
Thank you, thank you,
thank God for you, the wind beneath my wings

I also sung some of "Thank God I found you" with Cat, I haven't sung that song in a long long time so I forgot most of the words except for the chorus and unfortuanetly for some reason the video did not have the words...


Artist: Mariah Carey Lyrics
Song: Thank God I Found You Lyrics

(Mariah)
I would give up everything
Before I'd separate myself from you
After so much suffering
I've finally found a man that's true
I was all by myself for the longest time
So cold inside
And the hurt from the heart it would not subside
I felt like dying
Until you saved my life

(Chorus - all)

Thank God I found you
I was lost without you
My every wish and every dream
Somehow became reality
When you brought the sunlight
Completed my whole life
I'm overwhelmed with gratitude
Cause baby I'm so thankful
I found you

(Joe)
I would give you everything
There's nothing in this world I wouldn't do
To ensure your happiness
I'll cherish every part of you
Because without you beside me I can't survive
I don't wanna try
If you're keeping me warm each and every night
I'll be all right
Cause I need you in my life

(Chorus - all)

Thank God I found you (I'm begging you)
I was lost without you (so lost without you)
My every wish and every dream (every dream, every dream)
Somehow became reality
When you brought the sunlight (brought the sunlight)
Completed my whole life
I'm overwhelmed with gratitude
Cause baby I'm so thankful
I found you

-Bridge- (Mariah & Joe)

See I was so desolate
Before you came to me
Looking back I guess it shows
that we were destined to shine
After the rain to appreciate
And care for what we have
And I'd go through it all over again
To be able to feel this way

(Chorus - all)

Thank God I found you
I was lost without you (lost without you baby)
My every wish and every dream
Somehow became reality
When you brought the sunlight
Completed my whole life (whole life)
I'm overwhelmed with gratitude
Sweet baby I'm so thankful
I found you

(Chorus - all)
Thank God I found you
I was lost without you
I'm overwhelmed with gratitude
My baby I'm so thankful
I found you

(Mariah)

I'm overwhelmed with gratitude
My baby I'm so thankful I found you

I also helped one of J's friends which I didn't know sing this classic:


Artist: Michael Learns To Rock Lyrics
Song: That's Why (You Go Away) Lyrics

Baby want you tell me why there is sadness in your eyes
I don't wanna say goodbye to you
Love is one big illusion I should try to forget
But there is something left in my head

You're the one who set it up
Now you're the one to make it stop
I'm the one who's feeling lost right now
Now you want me to forget every little thing you said
But there is something left in my head

* CHORUS : I won't forget the way you're kissing
The feelings so strong were lasting for so long
But I'm not the man your heart is missing
That's why you go away I know

You were never satisfied no matter how I tried
Now you wanna say goodbye to me
Love is one big illusion I should try to forget
But there is something left in my head

* REPEAT CHORUS

Sitting here all alone in the middle of nowhere
Don't know which way to go
There is so much to say now between us
There ain't so much for you
There ain't so much for me anymore

* REPEAT CHORUS

But I think maybe we had the most fun singing this one... :P

Artist: Celine Dion Lyrics
Song: My Heart Will Go On Lyrics

Every night in my dreams
I see you. I feel you.
That is how I know you go on.

Far across the distance
And spaces between us
You have come to show you go on.

Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on
Once more you open the door
And you're here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on

Love can touch us one time
And last for a lifetime
And never go till we're one

Love was when I loved you
One true time I hold to
In my life we'll always go on

Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on
Once more you open the door
And you're here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on

There is some love that will not
go away

You're here, there's nothing I fear,
And I know that my heart will go on
We'll stay forever this way
You are safe in my heart
And my heart will go on and on


Mainly because it blew everyone's voices. :P Including mine and Shannon's whom I shared a mic with. Although I probably sounded horrible being beside V the next day despite my usual star singing :P, I feel bad I caused Shannon to lose her voice by picking this song cause she was singspiration/worship leading for her church the next day. Opps... my bad, I guess you could say the song was a bit too high for us. I could probably handle it, if I didn't have to sing "Wind beneath my wings" not too long before, which is pretty high at the end also. Good thing I decided not to pick 100 years also, I had heard it at the evangelistical meeting we had the night before, but it had nothing to do with Jason leaving really...

Ai.... JChao, you definetly will be missed! I remember first meeting J during my and I think our first year at CCF, he was a bit behind educationally wise, but not too much in age, I think he's still younger though, not 100% sure :P Anyhow, I remember how this guy was always lively, he especially liked to eat, which is cool, cause I like to eat too. But I'll always remember those Friday afternoons after small group walking all the way to Chinatown; J especially liked to eat Pho, especially with Hot Sauce! And he would always sweat while eating it, but it was worth it for all those "treasures" he would find in the bowl :P J is also very talkative, which works for me also since I also am, but actually when J talks, I'm usually not talking :P

And J is also very loving, my daughter is right! This is probably what I and others will remember most about him. He taught us that hugging is healthy and he is right! But it may be a while before I will get the chance to hug him again... People in my church don't seem to believe in hugs, not even my good friend felt really enthuasastic about a hug even though I haven't seen him for so long because he was in HK. So once I leave CCF, I guess that part of my balanced healthy lifestyle will go with them. J was always a good friend of mine and I used to see him several times a week back when we still both in school, now I'll be lucky to see him several times a year... :(

This is the song I was trying to sing for J when I selected it...


Artist: Trisha Yearwood Lyrics
Song: How Do I Live Without You Lyrics

How do I
Get through one night without you
If I had to live without you
What kind of life would that be?
Oh I need you in my arms
Need you to hold
Your my world my heart my soul
If you ever leave
Baby you'd take away everything good in my Life.

And tell me now
How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I
How do I
O how do I live?.

Without you
There'd be no sun in my sky
There would be no love in my life
There would be no world left for me
And I
Baby I don't know what I would do
I would be lost if I lost you
If you ever leave
Baby you would take away everything real in My life

And tell me now
How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever ever survive?
How do I
How do I
O how do I live?...

Please tell me baby..

How do I go on?
If you ever leave
Well baby you would take away everything
Need you with me
Baby don't you know your everything good in My life

And tell me now
How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I
How do I
O how do I live

How do I live without you
How do I live without you baby.......
How do I live....

But even though the book at the Karaoke place had the right title, it totally played the WRONG song, which actually goes by a different title and instead I got this one...

Artist: Michael Bolton Lyrics
Song: How Am I Supposed To Live Without You Lyrics

I could hardly believe it
When I heard the news today
I had to come and get it straight from you
They said you were leavin'
Someone swept you heart away
From the look upon your face I see it's true
So tell me all about it, tell me 'bout the plans you're makin'
Then tell me one thing more before I go

Tell me how am I supposed to live without you
Now that I've been lovin' you so long
How am I supposed to live without you
How am I supposed to carry on
When all that I've been livin' for is gone

I didn't come here for cryin'
Didn't come here to breakdown
It's just a dream of mine is coming to an end
An how can I blame you
When I built my world around
The hope that someday we'd be so much more than friends
And I don't wanna know the price I'm gonna pay for dreaming
When even now it's more than I can take

And I don't wanna face the price I'm gonna pay for dreaming
Now that your dream has come true



Which is kinda good too I suppose. Other people also sung some other sappy songs to express their feelings toward's J's leaving, you will be missed! Well this entry is getting long and it's getting late so I'm going to try to call it a night...

Love is most important in your life. A high love concentration indicates that you want love in your life. It is very important to you and something that you strive to attain. Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

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Haha, I knew it...I guess that's why some people think I need professional help and decided to ignore me. *cough cough* not to mention any names.....

Here is a song I heard a long time ago on Family channel when they were showing those videos in between shows. The song sounds good, I wish it were true. Although I once believed that my dream marriage was the happiest time in my life, having a different dream years later being proposed to was even more interesting. Can't remember how I felt, but being asked I guess isn't the same as the wedding itself. I never envisioned myself being the one proposed to, but that's how it happened in the dream...

A dream is a wish your heart makes
Bette Midler

A dream is a wish your heart makes
When you’re fast asleep
In dreams you will lose your heartache
Whatever you wish for you keep

Have faith in your dreams
And someday, your rainbow will come shining through
No matter how your heart is grieving
If you just keep believing
The dream that you wish will come true

A dream is a wish your heart makes
When you’re feeling small.
Alone in the night you whisper
Think no one can hear at all.
You wake with morning sunlight to find fortune that smile on you.
Don’t let your heart be filled with sorrow
For almost in tomorrow the dream you wish will come true.

The dream is a wish your heart makes
The dream is a wish your heart makes
You wake with the morning sunlight to find fortune that smile on you.
Don’t let your heart be filled with sorrow
For almost in tomorrow the dream you wish will come true.
No matter how your heart is grieving
If you just keep believing
The dream that you wish will come true

How can I tell Him about you?

SO how can I tell God there's a love in my life? What way is most appropriate for me to profess and pray about this? How do I tell God not to be jealous and that it's only a little bit of Eros tainting Agape... do people think about such things in their ""dating""?

Here's a "secular classic"...

. : Lobo - How Can I Tell Her : .

She knows when I'm lonesome.
She cried when I'm sad.
She's up in the good times.
She' s down in the bad.
Whenever I'm discouraged.
She knows just what to do.
But girl, she doesn't know about you.

I can tell her my troubles.
She makes them all seem right.
I can make up excuses.
Not to hold her at night.
We can talk of tomorrow.
I'll tell her things that I want to do.
But girl, how can I tell her about you?

How can I tell her about you?
Girl, please tell me what to do.
Everything seems right whenever I'm with you.
So girl, won't you tell me.
How to tell her about you?

How can I tell her I don't miss her whenever I'm away.
How can I say it's you and I think of every single night and day.
But when is it easy telling someone we're through.
Ah girl, help me tell her about you


Or rather, stage 2, POST Christianity...

He knows when I'm lonesome.
He cried when I'm sad.
He's up in the good times.
He' s down in the bad.
Whenever I'm discouraged.
He knows just what to do.
But girl, He doesn't know about you.

I can tell Him my troubles.
He makes them all seem right.
I can make up excuses.
Not to hold Him at night.
We can talk of tomorrow.
I'll tell Him things that I want to do.
But girl, how can I tell Him about you?

How can I tell Him about you?
Girl, please tell me what to do.
Everything seems right whenever I'm with you.
So girl, won't you tell me.
How to tell Him about you?

How can I tell Him I don't miss Him whenever I'm away.
How can I say it's you and I think of every single night and day.
But when is it easy telling someone we're through.
Ah girl, help me tell Him about you


Now to go "Christian" style with the CLASSIC that I want to sing again... ;)

Only God couLd Love you more...

I asked the Lord for someone,
and I always knew that in God's time and in God's way
it would be someone like you.
All my hopes and all my dreams
were suddenly fulfilled
It's almost unbelievable
our love is in his will.

Only God could love you more,
for he gave me this love I have for you.
What a blessing to know He's your Lord,
For only God could love you more, than I do.

I'm tempted to be saying ,
that we met by chance
But God was there at every turn,
In every circumstance
To share this life God gave me
seems such a fearful task,
But every moment we have shared
is more than I could ask

WAR DECLARED!!!! Secular -> Spiritual....

As the famous line in the movie Dragon Heart goes....

"My quest is in vanity.... my quest is Spiritual..... Spirtual...." *falls off his "high horse"?* Actually I believe in the movie and HisStory, it was a donkey in both....*raises eyebrow*

Anyhow, I've been CRITIZED by a friend of, hmm... go figure, someone who ignores me, and perhaps also "a friend of a friend of mine" that my blog is becomming "too Christian", too much "about God" and not enough about my life perhaps??? I dunno?!??! What is it they want to read on my blog anyhow? "Sex drugs and rock and roll???" It is not the quantity of praise I care about, but the QUALITY.... I may get more "Woweeee"S, from "Sex, Drugs and..." perhaps Satan, but I rather have God's praise, "than the praise of men..." [John 12:43]

So I say, "Bring it"... "Jesus reloaded...." "Jesus inside...." Only when one makes that "U-turn" to God as my church intern puts on his rear bumper or answers the "call to revolution" does one truly can receive reconcilation and peace with God and all of His creation, I have another entry on that soon "in the works..."

Well, so why the weird title? Why this change in me? Well seeing how other people have choosen to write about certain stuff and ME in their blog, I have now declared INTER-BLOGLOTIC WAR!!! Not just on those who perhaps don't share my so called "Selfish" viewpoint, but I want to declare war on the REAL ENEMY behind it all, the one who's deceived us and caused them to think perhaps one of us are misinterpreting God's plan, but God perhaps just has different plans for us and we can and should be perhaps in God's eyes "agreeing to disagree"ing, but instead, alias... [ai...] perhaps they ignore me because they've fallen into the "lies of the enemy"...

"If you forgive anyone, I also forgive him. And what I have forgiven—if there was anything to forgive—I have forgiven in the sight of Christ for your sake, 11in order that Satan might not outwit us. For we are not unaware of his schemes." [2 Corinthians 2:10-12]

Opps??? I just did it didn't I??? I did what I've Seen otherS do in their blogs, quote the "scary bible"?!?!? Oh well, what can I say? "That's the way... uh huh... uh huh... I blog it..." I hope my blog can related to the youngsters of today and in some way influence their lives to improve their relationship with God and to one another as God has commanded us, all for the expansion of his Kingdom, his glory and to help us better ICIC... Imitate Christ, Influence Community....

Remember....

'Jesus knew their thoughts and said to them: "Any kingdom divided against itself will be ruined, and a house divided against itself will fall.' [Luke, He is your Father->11:17]

I've experienced God today! And also experienced something else perhaps, hehe... not only at work, but I've had a bad week, yet I've seen "the shadow proves the sunshine", I've seen "God at work..." and it's true like near those last episodes in stage 4 of Initial D and I quote... (not necessarily in orDer)

"I used to have a figure like that when I was your age...Play around when are young..."

"I'm sure it's easy for you to attract LOTS of girls..."

"When you get old and have a figure like me...it's not very attractive to the ladies!"

"But, actually, the feeling you get when you finally get a girl to notice you after (all that hard work), it's a feeling that can never be replaced or replicated..."

Basically something you don't get if it's EASY to "get the girl..."

Ok, some more SECULAR first... it's also interesting to note that I usually don't watch Stargate Atlantis or maybe it was SG-1 and I happen to only stumble on this episode today because I just got off the phone after maybe the 3rd or 4th hour or longer conversation this week and needed something to do while I ate... like now I need something TO DO, while I try to prep myself for sleep... I've been awake "LONG time".... God must be doing another miracle....God, "me Love you long time!"

Anyhow the episode was about how the team, one of the members decided to falsely inpersonate, what is probably their "false God" anyhow, and it backfires. Another opposing, what they (SG-1 them) thought to be "false" also or another scam...

"He's pretty good too..." Inmitator woman: "We're dead..."

Turns out perhaps to be true! As their science couldn't solve the illness of those believing in the FEMALE, haha how ironic, God's rule... they tried to heal them with science, it worked for a bit, but they still relapsed into sickness which seemly had no cure... so what proceeded was that the Stargate base send in a medical envoy, but with all their technology, could not find the cause or cure for the disease as they had hope to disprove this "FALSE" God... and later the rep, prophet or maybe "Jesus" comes in and declares stuff like "The day of reckoning is comming.... The day of reckoning is here... see what evil you have caused by your unbelief...Their faith is the only thing that will save them..." even the woman was was the false God on the team, kept insisting it was all her fault and none of the tragedy would have happened to these portalled people had they not gone there. And as the "chief medical officer" declared, "I hate to say it, but nothign short of a miracle will save these people..." so then guess what??? It actually happens from the representation of the so called "FALSE" religion, and the bullets they try to use to kill him are stopped dead like Matrix style and the miracle happens, the team is also forgiven, the sick are healed, even those that died are RAISED FROM THE DEAD... and then the prophet or whoever, maybe Messiah who saves the day says "Tell others what you have seen here today"... Altogether at the same time, being quite "hideous" to look at, like Jesus style yo.... the episode ends in that cliff hanger....

But I hope not to let this "episode" of my life end there, here are the last few chapters of this week's "gospel" in my "everyday christianity"...I want to "tell others"... I want to FIGHT this war... and God willing, God will win!!! And perhaps, just maybe, somebody.... err.... nevermind.... (gets the girl...) Hmpf.... definetly NOT me :'( "Unlovable..."

I will now proceed with my own version of a movie quote blog entry, but not LOTR, another movie, not as popular, but SO GOOD... not sure if you've seen it.... "Greener Fields..." or as the saying goes "The grass is greener on the other side..."

Greener Fields
---------------

Pro -> Protanganist
Coach -> His soccer coach (this is a "soccer movie")
Girl/Her -> "He GETS the girl..." go figure....
Sista -> His foster sister in the adopting American family, turns out to be a REAL half or maybe more blood related sister in the end, opps a "SPOILER" :P
Manager -> University/School dean

Sista is ATTRACTED to Pro at first, but later he leaves them and it kinda dies, how sad :P

Coach: It's Logical... he used to be the hot shot, before you arrived....

Girl: Hi.......

Sista: Are you including your boyfriend Dave???

Girl: Ex-boyfriend Megan....

Sista: I see you're hear crashing the party alone (or something along those lines).


Coach: I tell you not to look for fowls...



Pro: I didn't think I'll be fouled by my own team....


Coach: What do you think you are? You're HOT STUFF?!?! You don't have what it takes to be a winner you understand??? Give me 25 laps....


Coach: I saved your ass out there... if I didn't make you run those laps....


Coach: We're guests in this country you here me?!?!




(Teammate) You know if you can get her away from him... score one for the good guys....


(Her) I thought you needed a ride... get in...


(Her) Well you're definetely in trouble and if you don't do something about Dave, he's going to mess you around and then his friends are going to start in on you....



(Her) No he stays here... he's my guest....


(Enemy) He's everyone's guest, everywhere,.... ever wonder why he's never home....



(Her) Why don't you ever have it out with him... beat him up or something, just defend yourself (Protanganist...)



(Foster Dad) I lied... I'm not a friend of your father's.... I was a friend of your mother's.... We fell into each other... but she was already spoken for.... I was angry.... she knew it was impossible, I knew it was impossible and then I saw them married.... .... ....I knew when I saw you, but right away, I went down.... Your mother didn't want to see me.... .... .... (climax missed it)... I wanted you to have it all, everything... because you are my son!

Me: As she would say.... "Oh dang!!!"


("Dad") He should have waited....

Pro: You lied??!?! You lied to me 17 years....

("Dad"): What kinda life would you have had???

Pro: (blah blah...) oh ya, your Bastard son eh?

Pro: What else do I need to know? You got my mother pregant and ran away... (blah)... I hate you, I hate you...

Half sister (who's infatuated with him, protaganist): What did you say to him? I'm not a child anymore, you're trying to protect me from him? I love him and you can't keep me from him...



Coach: Who do you know tells the truth all the time??? People lie cause they don't want to hurt others....


Coach: The best advice I'm every going to give you... can't take the heat?... get a job in the Kitchen....


"Sista": I want things to be ok at home... stay with us....

Pro: Please go away...

"Sista": My father welcome you into our home... you used our family... my father and mother and me... you really are an asshole you know that....

Coach: You want me to hit the next person that comes looking for you? (sarcastically)

Manager: Don't get changed... you have a day off... (tap that! :O :P)

Coach (training): You're looking pretty good, for a skinny kid....

(he starts to "tap that"... "go new guy... go new guy..." ever seen THAT movie? :P)

Foster Dad: Many people try to have a family, but he chose to leave us we have to respect his wishes... (daughter/half-daughter walks away...)

Dad (actually real): We can't go on and pretend like nothing happened... we should do something, after we are supposed to be "civilized".... (In Italian) She was already married 5 years, what was I supposed to do?

Son: If it was too late then, it is too late now...

Me: Hehe, the "too late" words, like in the Sunday sermon.

(Hehe, girl helps me with his rehab when his knee busted up from her EX... if he messes it up by pushing it, he could forever be unable to play soccer... girl "teases" him to get back in pool...)

Board member: Don't be so hasty... With (pro) gone, we may need Dave (ex) to help us win the game.... don't bench him, etc... etc...

(coach quits and walks out, to "do the right thing..."... as he put it "Then I guess I'm done...")

Board member: Think about it... soccer is not a popular sport in America, you're going to have a difficult time finding another coaching job, in fact you're going to have a hard time finding another job at all....

(Your typically last sports game in movies follows... the opposing team plays dirty... the "hero" saves the day after something stops him from playing the first half or whatever... but as I predicted, unexpected twist, he passes to his enemy for an assist....enemy gives him a helping hand up, he begins to trust him.... Aww.... "that's what I'm talking about!!!" Girlfriend sticks for her injured "dude in distress" in a "cheap shot", "referee, are you blind??!?!" His knee looks bad... is he going to save the day??? Is he going to sacrifice his knee or his possible, even professional career as a player to to make the shot?!?!? Can he do it?!?! Will it do it? Am I even building any suspense at all? :P His girl watches on... he runs, he kicks, it goes up, perfect arc.... barely misses the pole and goes in.... WOOOOOO.... darm cha! Darm cha!!! I hope I can do one for God like that one day...He gets the girl and kissed too.... "Hmmm...." His foster/real dad gets married so that they can formally adopt "I think I can clear that up..." "Daddy gets some" love too... hehe...What do you think LT and CW?)

Here is some theme music, start with some funny secular moded into Christian....

Even though I feel I'm TOO YOUNG :P V laughed at me (rolls eyes) for Apostles, we are the OLD team, so here is some OLD Classic, from the retros yo... MJ... Billie Jean!!!

Billie Jean...
--------------

She was more like a beauty queen from a movie scene
I said don't mind, but what do you mean I am the one
Who will dance on the floor in the round
She said I am the one, who will dance on the floor in the round

She told me her name was Billie Jean, as she caused a scene
Then every head turned with eyes that dreamed of being the one
Who will dance on the floor in the round

People always told me be careful of what you do
And don't go around breaking young girls' hearts
And mother always told me be careful of who you love
And be careful of what you do 'cause the lie becomes the truth

Billie Jean is not my lover
She's just a girl who claims that I am the one
But the kid is not my son
She says I am the one, but the kid is not my son

For forty days and for forty nights
The law was on her side
But who can stand when she's in demand
Her schemes and plans
'Cause we danced on the floor in the round
So take my strong advice, just remember to always think twice
(Do think twice)

She told my baby we'd danced till three, then she looked at me
Then showed a photo my baby cried his eyes were like mine (oh, no!)
'Cause we danced on the floor in the round, baby

People always told me be careful of what you do
And don't go around breaking young girls' hearts
She came and stood right by me
Then the smell of sweet perfume
This happened much too soon
She called me to her room

Billie Jean is not my lover
She's just a girl who claims that I am the one
But the kid is not my son

Billie Jean is not my lover
She's just a girl who claims that I am the one
But the kid is not my son
She says I am the one, but the kid is not my son

She says I am the one, but the kid is not my son
Billie Jean is not my lover
She's just a girl who claims that I am the one
But the kid is not my son
She says I am the one, but the kid is not my son

She says I am the one, but the kid is not my son
She says I am the one

Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover

Billie Jean is
Billie Jean is
Billie Jean is

Not my lover
Not my lover
Not my lover
Not my lover

Billie Jean is not my lover (she is just a girl)
Billie Jean is not my lover (she is just a girl)
Billie Jean is not my lover (she is just a girl)
Billie Jean is not my lover (she is just a girl)

Billie Jean is
Billie Jean is

Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover

Billie Jean is
Billie Jean is

Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover

Billie Jean is
Billie Jean is

Jesus Christ...
----------------
He was not like a beauty queen from a prom scene
People don't mind, but what do you mean He is the one?
Who will dance on the floor in the world...
God said He is the one, who will dance on the floor in the world...

He told me His name was Jesus Christ, as He caused a scene
Then every head turned with eyes that dreamed of being the one
Who will dance on the floor in the world...

People always told me don't hit it down third baseline
Tim's going to be breaking young girls' hearts
And mother Susie always told her be careful of who you love
...be careful of what you do 'cause the lie becomes the truth (like those pics :P <- br="" not="" sung="">
Jesus Christ is my lover
He's just a man who claims that God is the Son
But the Christ is God's son
God's says I am the one, but Jesus is my true son

For forty days and for forty nights
The law was on his side
But who can stand when evil's in demand
Satan schemes and plans
'Cause we danced on the floor in the world
So take my strong advice, just remember to always think twice
(Do think twice)

She told my Pastor we'd danced to be free, then she looked at me
Then showed a photo baby Jesus cried his eyes were like mine (oh, no!)
'Cause we danced on the floor in the world, Christian

People always told me don't hit it down third baseline
Tim's going to be breaking young girls' hearts
He came and stood right by me
Then the smell of sweet incense
This happened much too soon
He called me inner room

Jesus Christ is my lover
He's just a man who claims that God is the Son
But the Christ is God's son

Jesus Christ is my lover
He's just a man who claims that God is the Son
But the Christ is God's son
God's says I am the one, but Jesus is my true son

He's just a man who claims that God is the Son
Jesus Christ is my lover
He's just a man who claims that God is the Son
But the Christ is God's son
He's just a man who claims that God is the Son

He's just a man who claims that God is the Son
He says Christ is the one

Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover

Billie Jean is
Billie Jean is
Billie Jean is

Jesus lover
Jesus lover
Jesus lover
Jesus lover

Jesus Christ is my lover
He's just a man who claims that God is the one
But the Christ is God's son
God's says I am the one, but Jesus is my true son
lover

Jesus Christ is our lover (He is just a man)
Jesus Christ is our lover (He is just a man)
Jesus Christ is our lover (He is just a man)
Jesus Christ is our lover (He is just a man)

Jesus Christ is
Jesus Christ is

Jesus Christ is our lover
Jesus Christ is our lover

Jesus Christ is
Jesus Christ is

Jesus Christ is our lover
Jesus Christ is our lover

Jesus Christ is
Jesus Christ is

Here is the song I say goes with John 16...


So look inside yourself and decide, am I really the one who needs this so called "Professional help" which my Pastor, being in Ontario, Ministers are considered "Professional" is QUALIFIED to give anyhow, not to mention, heaven forbid, God incarnate Himself! Ooooo.... SCARY!!!! "Don't shut Him out of your Life!" Who's to decide what's REAL and what's NOT? I would say as my mom, a pagan sometimes says "movies is life... life is movies.... " or as Shakespeare put it "All the world's a stage, all the men and women merely players..." How about bible?

"This is the plan determined for the whole world; this is the hand stretched out over all nations." [Isaiah 14:26]

"If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you. [John 15:18-19]

I say, God says it best, so I think He should be the one to decide who needs HELP and what's REAL and what's NOT or WILL BE!!! [God cha!!!!]

Quick post...

This is temporary (will likely add more NON-Biblical words to it soon)...

[Colossians 3:13-14]

13Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 14And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. 15Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of ONE BODY you were called to peace. And be thankful.

"arg"... who needs to apologize now?

Maybe me I guess.... Well regardless of whether a judge, society or the world in general may judge the other party to be "at fault"... I'm always big about it and feel that I ought to apologize also as I believe that no matter how small, all parties involved probably contributed to whatever conflict or problem in the first place. As the old saying goes, "If you're not part of the solution, then you're part of the problem."

Tonight, I was just about to go to sleep, but then for no reason I decide to login to my mail. I guess I was thinking about mass e-mailing my group of friends again what's on my mind, especially since we had some discussion and prayer in dedication fellowship tonight...

But something got in the way... I remember my Pastor's wife, who's now in Germany with him once said "The life of Jesus is a life of interruptions..." I wish it wasn't! But what can I do? So get this... I get this e-mail in my inbox from a friend with "the end." as the subject... Err... I don't think I need my spiritual sense on this one to know that the contents probably aren't good :P

So what do I do? Being stupid as I am, I open it. OMG... why didn't I have the smarts to wait till I at least had some good sleep? But maybe I couldn't... afterall, it's not like the e-mail got to my inbox any earlier in the day and seeing the subject and knowing it's bad, maybe I wouldn't have been able to sleep without reading it first anyhow? I dunno... I just know it was bad news as expected...

But I guess the question I keep asking myself is why does it upset me so much? Even though I like to think God "selected" this group of people I e-mail, maybe I invoked too much of my own will. Perhaps a part of me intentionally selected these people whom I know are my friends, yet I also know they (at least most of them) are far away so I know I won't have to face them on a regular basis, if anything were to go wrong with our friendship as a result of anything I say.

So as you may have guessed, sometimes things do go wrong. I don't think what I said is always particular offensive. I just think some of my ideas are just perhaps too radical for some of them to accept. Which is ironically sad seeing how we should be able to have extraoridinary expectations because we have an extraoridinary God. But what has happened as a result instead? Some of them have decided it's better to ignore me than to accept the things I said.

Obviously, you gather that I'm going to say "I'm sorry" and I am. So, I'm sorry! I'm sorry I'm not an easy person to be friends with, I'm sorry I upset you, I'm sorry it's come to this. And I'm sorry that my beliefs seemed what you might term as "lunatic" to you... But how do you define "lunatic" exactly? Afterall, people say that Jesus was either a "liar", "lunatic", or ... hmm... I forgot the last L... And what about myself... everyone who is still a current attendee at my Logos Baptist church isn't ignoring me... yet, perhaps that isn't enough for me, so I branch out and sometimes attend RHCBC... However, there's this sister I know, she was actually going to RHCBC more than me for a while with her mom cause they moved or whatever the reason was...but yet she now goes to Logos Milliken... hmmm...

"If we are out of our mind, it is for the sake of God; if we are in our right mind, it is for you." [2 Cor 5:13]

Perhaps... perhaps in our CCF retreat we missed a point God wanted to tell us. Yes, sometimes we can seem to be "crazy" in our faith in Christ and what we do as Christians when we don't act like the world does. Maybe we accept people and want to live in (or at least "want to") harmony with everyone around us, while the pagan world looks on and thinks to themselves "How could that person forgive and still be friends with that person after all that person put him/her through?!?!?"

The point I guess I was going to say is that maybe God is also telling us we need to be "in the right" mind in the "presence of men"? I dunno... maybe... But then Jesus did say he has chosen us "out of the world" and that the world will eventually hate us because of who we are and who we will become in Christ. Besides, I'm sure many times they must have thought Paul was crazy... Jesus would save the world? Jesus couldn't even save Paul from receiving the 40 lashes minus 1 multiple times, afterall, Paul's death or punishment wasn't going to save the world from it's sins (or would it?), he wasn't Jesus...But regardless, Paul continued to choose the less religiously popular and be on the receiving rather and giving end of persecution as well. Why? Because Paul had a vision from God and I believe Paul was a man lead by the spirit to do what God had in mind for him even if things seemed grim at the time, you might even say he had a "spiritual sense" *raises eyebrow*....

Speaking of my "spiritual sense", I never really had a chance to share this with the people I usually e-mail yet. Funny thing, the person who has decided to start an argument with me and now is ignoring me, she doesn't think my "spiritual sense" can exist. Well... first let's do some biblical examples. Even Joseph and Daniel had the God given ability to interpret dreams (and even dreams of others) to tell the future through them and all this without even a personal relationship with Jesus Christ???? Well I'm sure they probably did at the very least have "faith" in God, perhaps even a relationship. But the point is, like I read in the book we're doing for Sunday School, Experiencing God, God can speak to us directly now through the Holy Spirit and He doesn't even need "dreams" or other mediums, even if sometimes I and perhaps others also may ask for those... and just why can't He? I do however, have another more recent, more personal example of perhaps my "spiritual sense" working for me during the summer retreat. You see, during the dedication meeting we have every year, for some reason God placed in my heart to see the need for more of His workers and also more than just the addition of my own life. So what did He do? Well I knew in my heart that God wanted to call more workers this year. So who will go? Who will God send? Who is willing to give their life to the gospel? Well honestly, nobody can really know for sure I suppose, afterall, even if God calls them it's still up to their individual free will given by God whether they decide they want this commitment or not. But it seems that night when I was praying before the meeting officially began that God placed this thought in my heart when I was silently asking the question "Yes, God needs more workers, but who?", the answer God gave me was what I was suddenly thinking about when I was done praying "probably WW (not his full name, but God did tell me his full name:P)". Then later, during the actual dedication for "the third heart" (a.k.a. FT Ministry), I was in the middle of crying, but I had to open my eyes for a split sec, even though I didn't want to look at my congregation to keep my eyes from sticking. But it seems like I opened my eyes right on time! As we are supposed to stand at the front to be prayed for afterwards after signing our lives away to God. When I opened my eyes, who did I see happen to be at the table at that time, but none other than WW! I thought "wow"! God answers prayers, it might not be who I wanted to see up there, but it's who God wanted to be up there this year... But what am I talking about? Maybe she's right, maybe there's really no such thing as a "spiritual sense" eh? *rolls eyes*

Whoa, I relized, this is like the third night I've been working on this entry already. Usually I work on it sometime between 4 to 5AMish when I can't sleep because of what has happened and not just this but also because of what hasn't happened, but perhaps needs to...But now it's almost 7:30... it's partly due to the fact that when the clock hit 6ish, I decided to go for that idea we discussed when I drove my friends home to catch the sunrise so I walked down Hwy. 10 until I found a fairly decent spot too big intersections away. Good exerise too I suppose :P Because of my recent stresses I guess, I've been eating too much "comfort food" at night and getting a little chubby *embrassed*. Dunno if I'll necessary call it stress, but I was talking to the church physician last night and mentioned I've been sleeping more lately and he attributes it to stress. *shrugs*, guess maybe it shows? I never told him anything specific...

LOL hmmm, this might go down as my longest post so far, perhaps the only one I truly kinda complete. I want to also address the other beef she had about me thinking I'm "holier than thou" cause I throw bible verses around or as she kinda put it "at people". No, that's not my intention at all! Guess, at least she was accurate about how little she knows me, now the other way, as someone older and wiser with a much more wider pool of people to compare to, I dunno... But again, I don't quote bible verses cause I want to make myself look "spiritual" or whatever. I just do it cause it's become a part of my speech. Ok, I guess I'm doing it again...

"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness," [2 Tim 3:16]

I guess the reason I give for using scripture would likely be in common with most people who quote the bible often, why use my own words when others already used God's? As the saying goes "God says it best..." All I'm saying is, as you grow in faith, God's word is not only in your mind or in your bible, but on your heart and and soul as well! Like the sensei says to his pupil in the classic movie Karate Kid, "Karate here (hand, I think he initially pointed to), Karate also here (head) and here (heart)..." Afterall, don't people tend to mimic and copy sayings of people they are in love with? Ooooo... burn! [Darm cha!]

Also, wow... this "holier than thou", what a line! Why didn't Satan think of it when Jesus was quoting the bible to him during the temptation of Jesus by Satan [Luke 4]?!? It's like "Man does not live by bread alone." and then Satan will be like "Stop thinking you're more holy than me Son of Man just because you quote the bible better than I can!" Wow!

Although the sunrise was a bit disappointing, the site of the beams through the clouds did remind me a bit of the Superman returns movie, especially the clouds looking like they are on fire. And I also did some kicks to warm up when I was walking to my viewing spot when it was initially too chilly, guess the sun wasn't up yet :P Not sure was it the kicks or just the sun going "up" above the clouds, but among some of the songs, one of the songs I thought of singing as part of my prayer walk I will put here as the "medium" to end my blog. It's from an Artist who hopefully wasn't afraid to die like I am as well, she did die...

TRY AGAIN
by Aaliyah

It's been a long time
We shouldn't have left you
Without a dope beat step to step to
Step to, step to, step to
Step to, step to
Freaky-freak

It's been a long time
We shouldn't have left you
Without a dope beat step to
Step to, step to, step to
Step to, step to
Freaky-freaky-freaky
Baby girl, uh

What would you do to get to me
What would you say to have your way
Would you give up or try again
If I hesitate to let you in

Now would you be yourself or play your role
Tell all the boys I'll keep you low
If I say, "No", would you turn away
Or play me off or would you stay, oh...oh...

And if at first you don't succeed
Then dust yourself off and try again
You can dust it off and try again, try again
'Cause if at first you don't succeed
You can dust it off and try again
Dust yourself off and try again, try again

I'm in to you, you into me
But I can't let it go so easily
Not till I see where this could be
Could be eternity or just a week

And yo', our chemistry is off the chain
It's perfect now, but will it change
This ain't a yes, this ain't a no
Just do your thing, we'll see how it go,
oh...oh....

And if at first you don't succeed
Then dust yourself off and try again
You can dust it off and try again, try again
'Cause if at first you don't succeed
You can dust it off and try again
Dust yourself off and try again, try again

Said you don't wanna throw it all away
I might be shy on the first date
What about the next date
huh, huh, huh, huh

Said you don't wanna throw it all away
I might be buggin'on the first date
What about the next date
huh, huh, huh, huh

And if at first you don't succeed
Then dust yourself off and try again
You can dust it off and try again, try again
'Cause if at first you don't succeed
You can dust it off and try again
Dust yourself off and try again, try again

Chicka-ah
Chicka-ah
Chicka-ah
Chicka-ah

And if at first you don?t succeed
You can dust it off and try again
Dust yourself off and try again, try again
'Cause if at first you don't succeed
You can dust it off and try again
Dust yourself off and try again, try again

And if at first you don't succeed
Dust yourself off and try again
You can dust it off and try again, try again
'Cause if at first you don't succeed
You can dust it off and try again
Dust yourself off and try again, try again

It's been a long time
We shouldn't have left you
Without a dope beat to step to
Step to, step to, step to
Step to, step to
Freaky-freaky

It's been a long time
We shouldn't have left you
Without a dope beat to step to
Step to, step to, step to
Step to, step to
Freaky-freaky

If at first you don't succeed
Dust yourself off and try again
You can dust it off and try again, try again
'Cause if at first you don't succeed
You can dust it off and try again
Dust yourself off and try again, try again

It's been a long time
We shouldn't have left you
Without a dope beat to step to
Step to, step to, step to
Step to, step to
Freaky-freaky

It's been a long time
We shouldn't have left you
Without a dope beat to step to
Step to, step to, step to
Step to, step to
Freaky-freaky



Again I'm sorry, but like V tells me, if you want to ignore me, it's really not my fault and there's nothing I can do...

V for Vendetta!

Wow, I just realized it's been a whole month since I posted. Well I've been busy trying to enjoy my temporary PAID 3 weeks + 5 unused vacation days as well as trying to look for some work at the same time as well as busy with other things...

LOL.... we were watching V for Vendetta (as I was telling my fellow audience, Vendetta is an English adapted word from the Italian word for Revenge basically or maybe you can say "Vengence" which might be French...) today and also ironically at the end of the movie, one of the sisters was reading the credits and said V's name cause that was the first familiar name she saw on the screen....LOL I have never seen the letter V used so many times in one sequence of words as in that one seen... so symbolic! Going to try to keep it short as my mom has been complaining about my sleeping schedule (well what can I say, insomia...) and the fact that I need to wake up early on Sunday and take the car...

But the movie was pretty good! Not pretty... but good! :P I loved the story line... I guess a part of me always wanted to be the liberation hero... power to the people... fight the power! I remember I used to fantasize I can be the hero by killing Mike Harris (BTW, I didn't type that or any of these e-mails I send you guys for that matter ) and saving Ontario from peril... Boy do I have a long story about that one!!! But save that for another day...

Hopefully, not spoiling the movie too much if you haven't seen it, but the part that struck me the most was that part when V was talking to her (yes, V is a guy, LOL...) after he tortured her to see how far she was willing to go to protect him... And then I was almost in tears... it not only reminded me about Jesus, but also myself... "Imitate Christ...." I still remember some quotes, or maybe I can find some...

Only one I can find at the moment :(...

"That's it! See, at first, I thought it was hate too. Hate was all I knew, it imprisoned me, taught me how to eat, how to drink, how to breathe. I thought I would die with all the hate in my veins. But then, something happened. It happened to me, just as it happened to you."

But basically she finally gained the courage, the strength and most importantly the "liberation" of not being afraid of dying for what she believed in... I was touched! My eyes watered, but I knew then that my faith is not in Vain! And as I was telling my cell group earlier on in fellowship when we had our summer retreat sharing about how faith, hope and love are all the same thing... but without love, you can't have the other two either I guess! Booyeah! Praise be to God and... hehe...!

Here is a partial quote from another scene that is also good, I've found most of the quotes in this moVie to be quite profound!

"...But what of the man? I know his name was Guy Fawkes and I know, in his 1605, he attempted to blow up the Houses of Parliament. But who was he really? What was he like? We are told to remember the idea, not the man, because a man can fail. He can be caught, he can be killed and forgotten, but 400 years later, an idea can still change the world. I've witnessed first hand the power of ideas, I've seen people kill in the name of them, and die defending them... but you cannot kiss an idea, cannot touch it, or hold it... ideas do not bleed, they do not feel pain, they do not love... And it is not an idea that I miss, it is a man... A man that made me remember the Fifth of November. A man that I will never forget."

Awwww....

Evey Hammond: I don't want you to die.
V: That's the most beautiful thing you could have ever given me.

There's also a song that I guess was the theme song of the movie you could say... At first I googled it up and found "Justin Timberlake" which made me laugh, I thought maybe he re-sung the original version, but it's a completely new version and also I think I actually heard it before when initially I didn't think I've even heard about it let alone heard it...

The old has gone...

Cry Me A River by Ella Fitzgerald

Now you say you're lonely
You cried the long night through
Well, you can cry me a river
Cry me a river
I cried a river over you
Now you say you're sorry
For being so untrue
Well, you can cry me a river
Cry me a river
Cause I cried, I cried
I cried a river over you
You drove me,
Nearly drove me out of my head
While you never shed a tear
Remember?
I remember all that you said
Told me love was too plebeian
Told me you were through with me and
Now you say you say love me
Well, just to prove you do
Come on and cry me a river
Cry me a river
I cried a river over you
You drove me
Nearly drove me out of my head
While you never shed a tear
Remember?
I remember all that you said
Told me love was to plebeian
Told me you were through with me...
And now, now you say you love me
Well, just to prove you do...
Come on! and cry, cry, cry me a river
Cry me a river...
Cause I cried a river over you
If my pillow could talk
Imagine what it would've said
T'would be a river of tears
I cried in bed
So you can cry me a river
Daddy, go ahead now and cry that river
Cause I cried how I cried
A river over you

The new has come? Nah... :P

Justin Timberlake
Cry Me A River

You were my sun
You were my earth
But you didn't know all the ways I loved you, no
So you took a chance
And made other plans
But I bet you didn't think your thing would come crashing down, no

You don't have to say, what you did,
I already know, I found out from him
Now there's just no chance, for you and me, there'll never be
And don't it make you sad about it

You told me you loved me
Why did you leave me, all alone
Now you tell me you need me
When you call me, on the phone
Girl I refuse, you must have me confused
With some other guy
Your bridges were burned, and now it's your turn
To cry, cry me a river
Cry me a river-er
Cry me a river
Cry me a river-er, yea yea

I know that they say
That somethings are better left unsaid
It wasn't like you only talked to him and you know it
(Don't act like you don't know it)
All of these things people told me
Keep messing with my head
(Messing with my head)
You should've picked honesty
Then you may not have blown it
(Yea..)

You don't have to say, what you did,
(Don't have to say, what you did)
I already know, I found out from him
(I already know, uh)
Now there's just no chance, for you and me, there'll never be
(No chance, you and me)
And don't it make you sad about it

You told me you loved me
Why did you leave me, all alone
(All alone)
Now you tell me you need me
When you call me, on the phone
(When you call me on the phone)
Girl I refuse, you must have me confused
With some other guy
(I'm not like them baby)
Your bridges were burned, and now it's your turn
(It's your turn)
To cry, cry me a river
(Go on and just)
Cry me a river-er
(Go on and just)
Cry me a river
(Baby go on and just)
Cry me a river-er, yea yea

Oh
(Oh)
The damage is done
So I guess I be leaving
Oh
(Oh)
The damage is done
So I guess I be leaving
Oh
(Oh)
The damage is done
So I guess I be leaving
Oh
(Oh)
The damage is done
So I guess I be... leaving

You don't have to say, what you did,
(Don't have to say, what you did)
I already know, I found out from him
(I already know, uh)
Now there's just no chance, for you and me, there'll never be
(No chance, you and me)
And don't it make you sad about it

Cry me a river
(Go on and just)
Cry me a river-er
(Baby go on and just)
Cry me a river
(You can go on and just)
Cry me a river-er, yea yea

Cry me a river
(Baby go on and just)
Cry me a river-er
(Go on and just)
Cry me a river
(Cause I've already cried)
Cry me a river-er, yea yea
(Ain't gonna cry no more, yea-yea)

Cry me a river
Cry me a river, oh
Cry me a river, oh
Cry me a river, oh

Cry me a river, oh
(Cry me, cry me)
Cry me a river, oh
(Cry me, cry me)
Cry me a river, oh
(Cry me, cry me)
Cry me a river, oh
(Cry me, cry me)

Cry me a river, oh
(Cry me, cry me)
Cry me a river, oh
(Cry me, cry me)
Cry me a river
(Cry me, cry me)

Apologies and another heart felt msg...

Since I publicly kinda insulted a dear friend of mine JM, I want to make a public apology. At least she's worthy of an apology, not like some other entities I know, not trying to be personally mean to anyone in particular...

I once kinda insulted, well I didn't mean it as an insult, it was really with a humorous intention my friend JM by saying she doesn't use enough original material on her blog. Sorry... Just to show you how I like to use "mediums" to express myself too and show just how "OK" it really is. Especially I feel the song, really really expresses how I feel right now. If only God will continue to work for us and also that we in return, continue to work with Him! :)

Artist: 98 Degrees Lyrics
Song: Because Of You Lyrics

It’s all... it’s all... it’s all...
You’re my sunshine after the rain
You’re the cure against my fear and my pain
‘Cause I’m losing my mind
When you’re not around
It’s all... it’s all...
It’s all because of you

You’re my sunshine
Oh yeah...

Baby I really know by now
Since we met that day
You showed me the way
I felt it then you gave me love
I can’t describe
How much I feel for you

I said baby I should have known by now
Should have been right there
Whenever you needed love
And if only you were here
I’d tell you, yes I’d tell you
Oh yeah...

Chorus:
You’re my sunshine after the rain
You’re the cure against my fear and my pain
‘Cause I’m losing my mind
When you’re not around
It’s all... it’s all...
It’s all because of you

Honestly, could it be you and me
Like it was before
Neither less or more
'Cause when I close my eyes
At night I realize that no one else
Could ever take your place

I still can feel and it’s so unreal
When you’re touching me Kisses endlessly
It’s just a place in the sun
Where our love’s begun
I miss you... yes I miss you

Chorus

If I knew how to tell you
What’s on my mind
Make you understand
Then I’d always be there
Right by your side

Chorus

Again JM, I'm sorry and thanks for praying for us! O:)

Quotes from famous author... Yau Yan LOL....

Just one of my many nicknames people have developed for me over the years. Wonder if they'll still use it on Sunday when I play some ball.

Anyhow I was typing to some friends last night about how words are just words... But sometimes they're not... I still don't know what God has in store for me in terms of His calling, but here's my first attempt at being quoted among the other great Christian authors...:

Words....
---------

"They say 'knowledge is power', perhaps there is some truth to it. We all know stick and stones can break bones, but use of words are harmless. Is it true? Words... are just words... until they are lifted up to God. It is then and only then that God can transubstaite them into spiritual weapons, with the power not only to penetrate flesh, but also turn over vast kingdoms of unforeseable, beyond material proportions. Until we lift our 'words' into prayer, they have no more power than 'thall shalt not kill' on a piece of paper. The paper on the door of someone who is murdered."

LOL... rubbish... LOL.... Does it make any sense to you? What do you think?

V about V

heya kev, thanks for the e-card the other day. i know i dont reply to
your
e-mails enough or talk too much on msn, but i do recieve them and read
all
your e-mails, and msn msgs.

well, i'll keep this short and hopefully to the point hehe.

I'm glad that you've entered into a relationship with vanessa(thats
what you
said in your email right?), and I'm not one to really judge, but i'll
just
leave some passages to remind you, and also to encourage you at the
same
time.

i guess the first one is, Proverbs 19:21 - Many are the plans in a
man's
heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails. - so yea, dont
forget
this, it is very important! because in the end whether we like it or
not, it
will be the LORD's purpose that prevails, so keep seeking out His will
kev,
and keep asking Him what His will is, and make sure it's not just
making
plans in vain in your heart without first consulting God about and and
really pray over these big decisions. I know he will guide you, and
just
trust that he will give you one step at a time to take, and dont think
5
steps ahead, just walk beside God one step at a time as he gives you
those
steps.

2nd point, whenever you wondering if this is the right thing to do,
turn to
1 cor 13:4-7. i can go on about this particular passage for a long
time, but
i think it is beautifully written, and really encapsulates all that is
good,
and what love should be. so ask yourself from time to time, am I
patient? am
I kind? am I envying others and their relationships? do i boast about
my own
relationship? am i rude to others with regards to my relationship and
their
circumstances in life? ah this is a big one lol, am I self-seeking? do
i put
the other person's needs before my own? do i get easily angered by
certain
things? do i still hold on to past hurts and remember how people have
wronged us? and you must make sure that you still love others
unconditionally even if they have hurt you, becuase verse 7 doesnt say
that
love will do these things only when we love someone else, but it will
always
do these things, protect, trust, hope for, and presevere; even when
people
have hurt us, or really did something bad. but love exists at all
times, and
it will presevere even during tough times, so make sure that you always
love
others, and love will continue to protect, trust and hope for, and
presevere
:)

continue to build and encourage one another. kev keep preaching even if
both
of you are mature, because it is not you who speaks, but God and His
living
word. even if both of you are mature, you can still grow, you guys are
not
perfect yet, none of us are, so keep encouraging one another to seek
after
Jesus, and allow God's word to work through you kev to nourish both
yours
and vanessa's soul.

seek out advice from someone wise, maybe your pastor, someone you look
up to
in your life, a strong leader? seek out advice in all aspects of your
life,
money, relationship, your walk with God, your family, your future. have
you
thought of finding someone to mentor you? I think that would be
beneficial,
because we all need guidance, and we don't have everything togeather
hehe so
it would be good if people could lead us along the correct path. but
yea,
this is important, to ask for help when you need it, there is nothing
wrong
with being humble and saying i need help in these areas, and to listen
to
the advice. although times it may not be the best feedback, but they
have
what is best for us in mind as well.


okay, i'm done for now lol, i hope these stay close to your heart. and
make
sure he is your firm foundation in life, because things will shake and
change, but Christ will be solid, and be something firm we can stand
on.

and yea, you can get the talk on tape at the afc office. they recorded
the
thing, i'm not sure if it's gonna be available online. but it was
pretty
good.

-VT... former boyfriend of CT... (not the only CT ;)

20 minutes... 20 hours... 20 hours...

I have been awake for 20 hours straight... and previously slept less than 6... Why do I do this to myself? IF I am doing it to myself that is... Where do I even get the energy... Perhaps I should consider seeing the doctor and possible sleeping pills, however unrecommended something like that can be...

The title reminds me of this joke on this video my brother downloaded off the net. It was a commercial for Verizon I think maybe... Actually I just double checked with my brother he told me Pacific Bell. I forget if they have that ISP in the states. I think so. Anyhow it was for a DSL commercial trying to sell itself based on the fact that high-speed cable connections have to share bandwidth in the neighbour causing it to be slow. And it was about the neighbours going crazy try to get each other off so they could get a better connection. One scene even showed a person in a shower cap cutting off some electrical wires on an electric box on the outside. I think that's for electricity, not cable, but it gets the job done I guess :P They told them to log off... And it was like "Got to get them to log off, that's the bottom line..." Then a news reporter comes and interviews someone, "How long would you say you've been online tonight sir?" and a rioting neighbour nearby was like "20 minutes?!?!? More like 20 hours...... 20 hours...." LOL... Well I wouldn't be in front of a screen for that many hours straight personally, I take breaks and often I don't use the computer or internet at home anymore...

Update from Justin Ho (sorry JH, I stole your blog entry :P)

greetings ... !

i know i haven't written in a while ... so let me begin by dispelling some rumours because well, rumours suck and could get out of hand.

not sure how much you heard but i heard i was dying, literally.

somewhere around june 1st i was admitted into the hospital for a pretty severe case of asthmatic-pneumonia-double-whamy combo ... at one point during the night i was coughing so much i literally couldn't breathe, thus i decided i needed to be treated immediately. what i thought would be just a late night (3am) visit to the hospital turned into a 11 day quarantine stay in not only one but two hong kong hospitals. the priminary reason why i was contained for so long was because they were scared that my pneumonia would turn into tuberculosis (TB) which would ultimately .... suck since its highly contagious and well, with the avian flu warnings and severe TB cases in hk right now, another TB kid to add to the already thousands of people with TB health problems would just not be needed. you know?

my asthmatic-pneumonia was supressed within a night in the hospital after being administered many antibiotic needles through an IV along with many pills which i'm slowly getting off as i type. the rest of my stay in the hospital consisted of the monitoring of my lungs to make sure i didn't have TB. it was my first time spending 11 straight days seeing no one i knew except the doctors and nurses (who came in every 2-3 hours consistently) since i was quarantined after all. the worst 4 minutes of my 11 day stay in the hospital had to be having a fiber optic camera as thick as a chopstick (called the bronchoscope) inserted through my nose, down my throat into my upper right lung cavity while extracting flem in the process (since x rays can only see so much) - as i was fully awake and seriously, not the most ... comfortable experience ever.

i've been out of the hospital now for 4-5 days now - still recooperating since my immune system is still pretty weak. plus as i'm slowly getting off my meds during the day i'm still drowsy and s p a c e d o u t . but i'm definitely getting less and less so as the day progresses. believe it or not, it was difficult for me to come back out after quarantine. the people out in the streets amused me as well i was seriously isolated. the food tasted better coming out. i was thankful for all the nurses that kept me talking or else, boy, i can't imagine not joking around with the nurses. serious social damage .... yeah.

i just want to THANK YOU all for your love + prayers throughout the last few weeks (and still continual encouragement) and i seriously just ... didn't realised how loved i am. whatever prayers and love you sent my way i definitely felt and somehow knew about it. thank you for all your unexpected gestures of love at just the perfect time which i can't even re-express i'm thankful i was receiving. i guess this time allowed me to reflect on ALOT of things. i mean i seriously had people thought i was dying ... and well, when you're in a hospital halfway around the world its hard not to let rumours get to you first. though this email came later than i wanted it to, i just want to let you know that i'm alright now and i hope things will get back to the way they were before i got sick.

i made a remark to my mom that i think in terms of memoriability, i will NEVER forget turning 24. i went into the hospital 23 and came out, yea, another year older. how special is THAT? (btw, chinese people don't use sarcasim much ... nor do i much anymore ...) i spent the last few hours of my birthday convincing the nurses who toke care of me to have a slice of my birthday cake (since i couldn't finish an entire cake myself). in the end i don't know if they actually had a slice but i can only imagine. my mom didn't find my outlook amusing. haha.

of course i never planned to get sick like this and honestly, i'm still taking in this entire situation, everyday. i'm still trying to back track everything to figure out what actually happened because i just didn't get sick due to a heavy rain storm. everything happened at such an unexpected time and blew into something of such .... vast proportions. of course no one expected any of this. i've been learning so much through this experience about diseases, health, people, emotions, hospitals, what it means to really grow up (of which i'm reminded that i'm so behind) .... i know that there's still so much more i'm supposed to learn and realise through my ... "break" right now but i'm not even there yet. i'm just taking it one day at a time, literally.

i seriously don't know how many people knew about what happened but if you know someone who heard rumours of rumours or rumours, would you mind forwarding this email to them for me? thank you so much ....

that's it from me for now but i'll try to write more as i find out more about whats happening in my life from today till ... tomorrow ....

j.

Jesus weeps... Jesus weeps with me...

John 11:35 ->Jesus wept. The famous "shortest" verse of the bible. I don't believe there are any with 1 word, or others with only 2, but please correct me if I'm wrong. Perhaps I should dig deeper into the meaning or history of this verse someday/sometime. But it definetly is interest, perhaps significant that this verse is only "Jesus wept". As if the author thought "Jesus wept" is sufficient to cover it for this verse, it is afterall a "complete thought". If I recall there are few, perhaps only one mention of Jesus weeping in gospel, of course others wept, but not necessarily Jesus. If you read the passage in context, you will find that Jesus is in this passage weeping for his friend Lazarus he raised from the dead. LOL that so reminds me of that Blockage joke I was making with my friend EW today. Anyhow my point is this verse really reminds us of the human side of Jesus and like the bible puts it: "For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses," [Hebrews 4:15a] And like it says in the famous footprints story: During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints,
it was then I carried you." (http://freespace.virgin.net/derek.berger/footprints.html) So I was thinking today... when I weep, or when we weep, I would assume God is also there weeping with us! It may sound like a surpise and I know like me, you might think God is so high and mighty and sometimes we forget God is also humble and made his dwelling among us and yes, God can cry... And I believe when I cry, I don't cry alone, I at least have Jesus there with me, possibly crying himself by my side... afterall didn't God say "I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me." [Matthew 25:40] Something to think about perhaps the next time we are given the opportunity to do or not do something that can lead to someone else crying or helping to ease their pain... Perhaps there really are "Tears from heaven" as that famous songs go. Come to think of it, despite the fact that many people, especially guitarist think that song is good and a classic, I never really looked into the lyrics or ever listened to the song before. Anyhow, here are the lyrics...

Tears In Heaven
by Eric Clapton and Will Jennings
------------------------------------

Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven?
Would it be the same
If I saw you in heaven?


I must be strong
And carry on,
'Cause I know I don't belong
Here in heaven.


Would you hold my hand
If I saw you in heaven?
Would you help me stand
If I saw you in heaven?


I'll find my way
Through night and day,
'Cause I know I just can't stay
Here in heaven.


Time can bring you down,
Time can bend your knees.
Time can break your heart,
Have you begging please, begging please.


Beyond the door,
There's peace I'm sure,
And I know there'll be no more
Tears in heaven.


Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven?
Would it be the same
If I saw you in heaven?


I must be strong
And carry on,
'Cause I know I don't belong
Here in heaven.

OOOo... I am itching now to hear some guitar vocalist play and sing that song now... JM perhaps... that would be something... or perhaps ET... Hehe... LOL I never noticed those were his initials, kinda funny... no offense bro...

Finally an update eh? Perhaps not the title you were expecting, but my blog is always an honest one. Even if sometimes I write the wrong thing, Sorry... The song we use as part of my CCSA team dance, I always thought it was cool, cause it's secular, yet Christian. But I never really took the time to look at the lyrics...

So if you're like me, here they are...

Jesus Walks Lyrics
Kanye West
--------------------

We at war
We at war with terrorism, racism, and most of all we at war with ourselves
(Jesus Walks)
God show me the way because the Devil trying to break me down
(Jesus Walks with me) with me with me with me [fades]

You know what the Midwest is?
Young & Restless
Where restless Niggaz might snatch your necklace
And next these Niggaz might jack your Lexus
Somebody tell these Niggaz who Kanye West is
I walk through the valley where the shadow of death is
Top floor the view alone will leave you breathless Uhhhh!
Try to catch it Uhhhh! It's kinda hard hard
Getting choked by the detectives yeah yeah now check the method
They be asking us questions, harass and arrest us
Saying "we eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast"
Huh? Yall eat pieces of shit? What's the basis?
We ain't going nowhere but got suits and cases
A trunk full of coke rental car from Avis
My momma used to say only Jesus can save us
Well momma I know I act a fool
But I'll be gone til November I got packs to move I Hope

(Jesus Walks)
God show me the way because the Devil trying to break me down
(Jesus Walks with me)
The only thing that I pray is that me feet don't fail me now
(Jesus Walks)
And I don't think there is nothing I can do now to right my wrongs
(Jesus Walks with me)
I want to talk to God but I'm afraid because we ain't spoke in so long

(Jesus Walks)
God show me the way because the Devil trying to break me down
(Jesus Walks with me)
The only thing that I pray is that me feet don't fail me now
(Jesus Walks)
And I don't think there is nothing I can do now to right my wrongs
(Jesus Walks with me)
I want to talk to God but I'm afraid because we ain't spoke in so long

To the hustlas, killers, murderers, drug dealers even the strippers
To the victims of Welfare for we living in hell here hell yeah
Now hear ye hear ye want to see Thee more clearly
I know he hear me when my feet get weary
Cuz we're the almost nearly extinct
We rappers are role models we rap we don't think
I ain't here to argue about his facial features
Or here to convert atheists into believers
I'm just trying to say the way school need teachers
The way Kathie Lee needed Regis that's the way yall need Jesus
So here go my single dog radio needs this
They say you can rap about anything except for Jesus
That means guns, sex, lies, video tapes
But if I talk about God my record won't get played Huh?
Well let this take away from my spins
Which will probably take away from my ends
Then I hope this take away from my sins
And bring the day that I'm dreaming about
Next time I'm in the club everybody screaming out

(Jesus Walks)
God show me the way because the devil trying to break me down
(Jesus Walks with me)
The only thing that I pray is that me feet don't fail me now

There are some nice Christian components to it, but as for some of the other parts... well....

Anyhow, this week my very good friend and bro in Christ EW finally got back from HK! :) Tonight I went out with him and had a great time, hopefully good enough to keep my mind off what can get me to tears and lead me to a peaceful, unsinful sleep away from the insomia I get sometimes... BTW, it's almost 6AM right now...So I think I will try to sleep now and probably expand on this entry more late on today or tommorow...

I find myself debating whether I need to mention what brings me to tears, if you've been reading my blog regularly, you could possibly already know seeing other couples always gets me in a down mood and I've been on a "couples-boycott" so to call it.

It's actually two days since I wrote this entry (started it on Sunday, now it's Tuesday). Can't really remember what I wanted to add. But I was reading 2 Cor 7 for devotion last night, late at night and verse 10 "Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death." really stuck out at me. I've been thinking, this new type of pain I've been feeling sometimes over somebody else, pain that can't be solved by sinning... Perhaps it's all part of God's plan.

95 Accord drivers unite...

As I was trying to fix the locking system on my mom's car last night because I couldn't make it to my softball game, it dawned on me, my friend Justin Ho also drives "a 95"...I am reminded of the time he drove me, I believe it was to the very first CCF retreat we had in his 95...Hehe, I remember that agressive left turn he made at that street in downtown too, guess those extra 2 cylinders do make a difference.

As some of you might know, I have had the locking system in my car malfunction on me for a while and was unable to use the power lock switch to unlock the doors, only lock them for the longest time.

I brought it to an ex-coworker who's a mechanic and even he wasn't sure what's wrong. I also already checked out the door-lock control unit using my Electrical Engineering skills which he thought it might be, but it seemed to check out completely fine so I didn't think it was that unit. Yesturday I disconnected the power lock control unit on the passenger side to test the circuit for continuity (or in other words a connection) and all of a sudden I noticed the door power locked by itself! :O Then I hooked the switch back up and tried it. Both the lock and unlock worked this time :) It also worked on the drivers side which was a pleasant surprise. But I discovered it won't work again when I plug that connector back in on the passenger side. So hence I had to leave it unplugged. It was probably that unit that crashed causing the whole system to lock me out last time.

So I thought to myself, if only fixing my friend's health issue could be so easy also. Why can't I fix my fellow 95 Accord driver the same way I can fix my mom's Accord? :P I was thinking, I really ought to purchase that black V6 95 Accord someone else is selling if God takes JH away to carry on his legacy. It's like that Simpsons episode when Homer has to eat his pet crab (well shorta...) "God would have wanted it that way... *sniff sniff*"

Actually I finished this entry late, I actually got another e-mail from someone else I don't even know, but it was forwarded to me from another CCF friend that Justin is feeling better. Thank God. He can do what I can't ;)

[Ai....deem fun ar....?] Pray for Justin Ho...

Ironically, here I am, concerned about my petty problems, when a brother very dear to me I discover is possibly dying... oh the shame... the shame... Please pray for him! I know if God wants to take him home now, he will go, but I wish God would let him stay a little longer... I miss him...

I'll be quoting an e-mail as the majority part of this blog entry...:

"LL..... you should know much better than to trying to e-mail my MSN/hotmail account which I never check and use my ____ one instead... but as fate, or rather GOD! would have it, I happen to be able to start my devotion when the pop-up alert showed up on my MSN..."

How can I sleep? The bro who first made me realize I'm not alone in that sin, the one who encourage me to hang in there... possibly one day he'll be smiling down on me from heaven when God grants me a wife (IF He grants me a wife) in part due to my repentance, in part due to his willingingness and humbleness to be the one to share about that... I can never forget you Justin Ho... I love you bro... I know I ought to be sleeping, since I have to work early tommorow, but it's just so hot without AC... Just hang in there bro, I'll be mass e-mailing this prayer request out soon... soon... I trust in him you'll last till at least tommorow evening when I get home from work, I hope... Don't die on me now, I'm even considering to skip lunch at work tommorow to fast and pray for you...

Ironically you were the one to share about how we should not be pestimistic that we thought WN wasn't going to make it that one eventful day in CCF years ago... Now it's your turn... hang in there... we're praying for you...



"Forwarded message:



Date: Fri, 02 Jun 2006 09:36:56 -0400

Dear brothers and sisters in Christ.

For all those who were here last year you would know Justin Ho a dear brother in Christ. I am sad to announce that Justin has TB and is now in critical condition - in isolation in the hospital in hong kong. Our sister in Christ, Candy Wong has been on a missions trip in china/hk and has asked to call for an urgent prayer meeting as she is with him now.

If you could please pass the word around to other brothers and sisters to gather in groups of two or three and pray wherever you are for Justin and his family that would be greatly appreciated.


God bless,
Wynne


Dear brothers and sisters.

In addition to our prayers. I think it would be nice to know that Justin has a lot of friends and family rooting for him back home. So I am putting together a book for our friend. If you have message of encouragment and message that will put a smile on his face please send an email to me with the subject "For Justin". I also need pictures and anything else you would like to send to Justin or quotes or funny moments. ANYTHING.

Please pass this email to any of his friends or anyone you might think will have something to say to him.

The cut off date for this is MONDAY June 5th 11:59am! I need time to put together the book and courier it to him so please pass this and do this urgently.

My email is wynne.ng@gmail.com or hopeis4ever@hotmail.com

Thank you for your help! God bless.
Luv: Princess~~"

Here's a song that represents how I feel right now...

It's a classic d@ng... why they stop me at Karoake that time? I feel ashamed I want to sing it when my friend EW comes back and yet haven't learned it all yet when I tried to sing it tonight....

Neil Diamond - He Ain't Heavy... He's My Brother Lyrics

The road is long
With many a winding turn
That leads us to who knows where
Who knows where

But I'm strong
Strong enough to carry him
He ain't heavy, he's my brother

So on we go
His welfare is of my concern
No burden is he, to bear
We'll get there
For I know
He would not encumber me
He ain't heavy, he's my brother

If I'm laden at all
I'm laden with sadness
That everyone's heart
Isn't filled with the gladness
Of love for one another

It's a long, long road
From which there is no return
While we're on our way to there
Why not share

And the load
Doesn't weigh me down at all
He ain't heavy, he's my brother
He ain't heavy, he's my brother.

Hang in there JH... God beam my prayers up!

Campus Challenge

(POSTING THIS FOR NOW... WILL LIKELY EDIT AGAIN LATER...)

On the May victoria weekend I went away for Campus Challenge just like last year. Except this year I had to book a vacation day for it at work cause my job requires me to work ALL Saturdays for about a straight 10 weeks or so now. I haven't had a chance to update my blog for a while, but now I have some free time.

Anyhow Campus Challenge this year was really really great! I know last year when I went it was pretty good already, but for some reason I found this year's CC totally awesome, it's beyond description. The only thing that on the back of my mind that's no

Lately it's been REALLY HOT! And no, I don't mean my love life... *rolls eyes*... Just the weather has been crazy hot today and my cheapo apartment I live in doesn't turn on the AC until June I heard... Hence why I'm finishing this blog entry I started at work, because it's so hot that I can't even sleep...But yet, I didn't finish the blog till today... well the AC is supposed to go on tommorow. Well what's REALLY IRONIC is a little over a week ago, I was concerned that when I was going to Trent for Campus Challenge, there would be no AC, but it was freezing cold when I was trying to sleep. I felt I didn't have enough clothing also, but now it's like I just don't have any more I can take off... LOL, I wonder if there's any truth to this sweating the weight off thing, well I guess I'll find out soon... It's also my fault in a way, they gave us linen last year and I assumed they would do the same this year and didn't even read the e-mail beforehand. Well I was kinda swapped with work as well. What upsets me is it's actually the first day of June now, the AC is supposed to come on in June, but it's not on yet.

I also got a long awaited souvenier at CC... the CCF photo DVD! Woot Woot! :) I must say, I was a bit jealous of all the other grads getting their own section of pics in the end of year Banquet's slideshow... BUT then...I discovered I also have my own spread and in my own hmm... whatever you call that graduation outfit thingy again... Awww! Thanks AA! Hehe, guess we have some "honary members" to RCCF, including both my mommas... Although I wished there wasn't any couple pics... argh and I told myself I wouldn't sin tonight... not to mention there was quite an unusual number of LL pics, go figure AA... *rolls eyes*...And... just when I didn't think there was any pics with PJ, whoop there he is LOL... Haha, he actually is an ex-CCF member... it's like Winnipeg CCF I believe it was meets Ryerson... jokes... good times... good times, it's just the couple pics that I have a beef with...

Well the last part of the slideshow, it's mostly secular songs except for the part with the Wednesday meeting slides, all Christian, nice touch AA! ;) Anyhow, there is this one secular song in there that kinda got to me... I looked up the lyrics today and surprisingly it's from an old band I used to listen to, the Backstreet Boys? Like... "HELLO....."

Backstreet Boys - Just Want You To Know
Album: "Never Gone" (2005)
Looking at your picture
from when we first met
You gave me a smile
that I could never forget
And nothing I could do
could protect me from you that night

Wrapped around your finger,
always on my mind
The days would blend
'cause we stayed up all night
Yeah, you and I were everything,
everything to me

I just want you to know
that I've been fighting to let you go
Some days I make it through
and then there's nights that never end
I wish that I could believe
that there's a day you'll come back to me
But still I have to say
I would do it all again
Just want you to know

All the doors are closing
I'm tryin' to move ahead
And deep inside
I wish it's me instead
My dreams are empty from the day,
the day you slipped away

I just want you to know
that I've been fighting to let you go
Some days I make it through
and then there's nights that never end
I wish that I could believe
that there's a day you'll come back to me
But still I have to say
I would do it all again
Just want you to know

That since I lost you,
I lost myself
No I can't fake it,
there's no one else

I just want you to know
That I've been fighting to let you go
Some days I make it through
and then there's nights that never end
I wish that I could believe
that there's a day you'll come back to me
But still I have to say
I would do it all again
Just want you to know

That I've been fighting to let you go
Some days I make it through
and then there's nights that never end
I wish that I could believe
that there's a day you'll come back to me
But still I have to say
I would do it all again
Just want you to know

Well a little different from the way a friend of mine does things, I don't like to post lyrics without a little bit of commentary... Let me get one thing straight... I'm WAY over her. What I'm not over is what She left me with, this huge intollerability of seeing couples...